Personal Development
6 Effective Tips On How To Deal With Fear
Sooner or later every person asks this question: “How do I deal with fear?”. Fear is one of the most important life lessons every human being learns. Overcoming our fears always makes us stronger. But when we don’t know how to deal with fear it can make our life miserable and destroy us completely.
Life requires the greatest courage. If you are in a state of fear, you do not live, you exist. Living in fear is worse than death. Fear paralyzes you and takes your energy. It is fear that is the root cause of most diseases, as it absorbs a huge amount of energy. There is not a single person on Earth who has not experienced fear or its variations at least once – anxiety, panic, self-doubt, jealousy, etc. That’s why it is so important to know how to deal with fear.
Only brave people can live their lives to the fullest and be happy. However, the paradox is that it is useless to fight fear. Every time we fight against something, we give even more energy to our fear. As a result, it becomes even stronger, and we become weaker.
So how do we deal with fear then? First of all, let’s find out what the nature of fear is.
Understanding The Nature Of Your Fear
Fear is energy, or rather its excessive amount (CHA), which occurs when the object of fear is given excessive importance. Excess energy (CHA) disrupts the balance (LAN) in the energy field and creates a balancing force aimed at its elimination (SO).
For example, if you are walking on the edge of a cliff and are terrified of falling, the balancing forces will try to eliminate the excess energy in the easiest way. In this way, they will push you into the abyss, thereby ending with you as a carrier of excess energy. However, this option does not suit you, so you try your best to keep yourself calm, resisting the actions of balancing forces. In order to balance the excess energy that fear carries, you begin to put extra effort, as a result of which you will lose even more energy.
If the excess energy contained in fear is large enough, you lose control of it. And then the balancing forces do whatever they want to you. You start to panic and fall into the abyss from the cliff.
So, If Fight Your Fear Is Useless, What Can We Do Then?
Any fighting is always useless indeed. Especially when we’re talking about our fears. But there is something we can always do about our fears. Let me share with you my tips on how to deal with fear. They can help you to look at your fears from another angle and take control of them.
6 Tips On How To Deal With Fear
1. Reduce the amount of energy you give to fear
When you find yourself in a state of a panic attack, the first thing you should do is to reduce the amount of energy you give to fear as quickly as possible. To do this, you need to quickly switch your attention to something else. In other words, you need to start doing something. The activity does not necessarily have to concern itself. It’s enough to just make yourself busy with something, no matter what. As soon as you begin to actively engage in something abstract, you will feel your fear and anxiety have subsided.
This way you redirect your energy from thoughts to actions. There is no free energy left for feeding your fear, as it has been transformed into action. As a result, you calm down and stop radiating negativity, that as we all know always attracts what you are afraid of.
2. Create a Plan B
My second tip on how to deal with fear is to reduce its excessive importance by creating the so-called “Plan B”. By “Plan B” I mean a backup option. In other words, speculate on what you will do if what you feared will happen? Think about your behavior. And, thus, calm yourself down.
For example, you are afraid to take the exam because you are afraid to “fail” it. Imagine that you have already “failed”. What are you going to do? Most likely, you will retake it. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Even if you do not pass now, next time you will pass for sure. Take the retake as a backup and take it with you to the exam as a “Plan B” option.
However, do not cling to this option. Just formulate it for yourself, and set it aside. Don’t feed it with your energy. Keep it in your head as a backup option, but visualize at the same time what you want to get ideally – a good score for the exam.
You can use the following affirmation:
“Universe, I trust you completely. I know that you will organize everything in the best way for me anyway. But if possible, please make sure that I pass the exam and get a good grade for it. Thanks!”
3. Observe your fear
My third tip on how to deal with fear is to neutralize it by observing it.
Fear has a significant impact on your life only if you are not able to see yourself from the outside. Look at fear consciously. As soon as you start watching how afraid you are, you will come to realize what is really happening to you. Let yourself be afraid, but do it consciously. In the state of awareness, you do not give energy to your fear, so your negative expectations are not realized.
However, if you start to fight your fear (to force yourself not to be afraid), it means that you attach great importance to it. As a result, you give your energy to fear, due to which it is manifested in your reality.
Thus, it is necessary to stop fighting fear and resist it. Go towards your fear and allow yourself to be scared. Understand that trembling with fear means trying to overcome it. The tremor happens due to the great loss of energy when you begin to attach great importance to your fear. But, when you consciously enter into your fear, you will see how your fear will gradually disappear.
4. Understanding that everything is logical in our Universe
My fourth tip on how to deal with fear is to understand that the Universe never wastes its energy. Everything is logical – it is simply not profitable to spend energy on something that requires large energy costs. Trouble is always associated with high energy costs. And pleasant events, on the contrary, are the norm, and, accordingly, require minimal energy consumption.
When the mind does not understand the law of least resistance, it begins to struggle with the Universe, creating obstacles and new problems. It is the mind, not the Universe! The mind tries to control everything, creating a scenario of undesirable events. And, paradoxically, it is you, and not someone else, scrolling in your head all those thoughts about what you are afraid of and what you do NOT want. And this is how you create for yourself a reality that is full of negative events. Everything is logical – we attract what we reflect.
The thing is, you don’t know and you can’t know how things are supposed to develop in the Universe for your Highest good. So stop constantly worrying about all the possible scenarios. All you have to do is formulate a firm intention to get what you DO WANT and stop focusing on what you would like to avoid. Trust the Universe – it always organizes everything in the best way for you.
Very soon you will notice that all the circumstances in your life begin to develop favorably, as if by themselves, and without your intervention. It is not profitable for the Universe to make troubles for you, not only because it loves and always cares about you, but, above all, because less energy is spent in this way.
When you are happy and satisfied, you draw energy from your Inner source through the positive vibrations that you yourself radiate. When you worry and panic, being under the influence of your ego, you block the connection with your internal source of energy and begin to “pull” this energy directly from the Universe or from the energy field of the people around you, thereby, committing energy theft and violating the Law of energy exchange in the Universe. Moreover, this energy you spend on your negative emotions, creating, thereby, negative energy radiation on the Earth. Of course, such radiation is extremely unprofitable for the Universe. So to compensate for the energy you took from it, it will give you exactly what resonates with your radiation. If you radiate fear, then, accordingly, you will get exactly what you are so afraid of.
Note:
the Internal source of man contains as much energy as the Universe has given him according to his individual development and needs. The increase in the amount of human energy of the internal source occurs through the disclosure of its internal potential. Negative emotions are a form of blocking of the inner potential, which prevents the flow of energy from the internal source. A person under the influence of negative emotions begins to take energy directly from the universal source or from the energy field of the people around him, which leads to a violation of the law of energy exchange.
The Universe compensates for the “stolen” energy by taking away from a person what is important to him: health, close people, well-being, etc. We always receive energy of exactly the quality that we radiate. Negativity always attracts Negativity.
5. Stop vibrating at the low frequency
My fifth tip on how to deal with fear is about offensive people. If you are afraid that you may be offended by a particular person, you need to stop vibrating at the same frequency with him. The one who wants to hurt you emits a low vibration: negative emotions such as aggression, anger, hatred, etc. Because he emits these vibrations, it requires energy to maintain him. Moreover, this energy must be similar to the energy of his emotions – that is, it must also be negative.
The most convenient way to obtain the energy of this quality is to cause fear in his victim. Thus, the victim will give him his energy through the manifestation of fear. This, incidentally, is one of the most common forms of energy vampirism. At the same time, fear always attracts exactly what you are afraid of.
To eliminate this type of fear, it is enough to be really indifferent to a potential offender. Just stop thinking about him, consciously letting him go.
6. Understanding that fear lives in the future
This is my last but very important tip on how to deal with fear. It is very important to realize that fear does not exist in the present moment, it always exists in the future. You are always afraid of something that may happen in the future.
For example, if you are on the edge of a cliff, you are afraid that you may fall. But you will fall in the future, not now. Falling into the abyss even in a second is your future, not the present. In the present moment, you are standing on the edge of a cliff, and you’re not falling into it. In other words, in the present moment, you are doing well.
Or, for example, you are afraid to go to the exam. Realize exactly what you are afraid of. Most likely get a bad score. But even if it happens, it will happen in the future. At this moment you are at home preparing for the exam – right now there is absolutely nothing to be afraid of.
Or, for example, you are afraid of flying on a plane. Be aware of what your fear is specifically associated with. After all, in fact, you are not afraid of the plane, and not even the flight. In fact, you are afraid to die in a plane crash. That is, your real fear is the fear of death, not the plane and not the flight. And now, notice what’s happening in the present moment. You’re sitting in a comfortable airplane seat, the stewardess offers you a cup of tea – there is nothing to be afraid of, everything is good.
Thus, fear always lives in the future. And if you feel fear, then you live there with it. You’re not in the present moment. So instead of actively fighting your fear, just go back to the present moment. Do it right now. Stop reading this article for a moment and look around. This is your present. Just a moment separates your present from the past and the future. The present moment is fleeting and barely perceptible, but it is from this moment that the whole life develops. There is no life either in the past or in the future, it is only in the present. So enter the present moment totally, feel its presence, and you will see that there is no fear.
The past is gone – it’s dead. There is no future yet – it was not born. Every moment of your life die for your past and be born for the future. You will be able to relax only when the past will cease to pull you back, and the future will stop contracting you in a state of fear. In the present moment, we are calm, relaxed, balanced, immortal. In the present moment, we are in peace and harmony!
Known for their exaggerated sense of self-importance, narcissists think that the world literally revolves around them. Their actions, attitudes, behavior, and the language they use determine their state. They draw their main satisfaction from making other people see them as persons of great importance who know everything. They do not care whether their actions may have an undesirable effect on others.
Who is a Narcissist?
Narcissists are smitten with an idealized self-image, which they wear around other people to escape reality. Deep down they are wounded creatures who are just too scared to admit it to themselves and other people around them. To compensate for their injuries, they create a “perfect person” who is flawless in an attempt to make themselves feel better.
Psychotherapy has proven to work just fine for the majority of people diagnosed with this condition. It’s not that narcissists are very dangerous people, but spending too much time around them might have adverse effects on you. Their alter-ego may begin to make you feel like a failure or worse still stop you from living to your full potential.
The games narcissists play may also leave you vulnerable to other strangers. Narcissists live on making other people feel less achieved about themselves and regard them as some form of a superhero.
The Mind Games Narcissists Play
Narcissists play mind games to manipulate our thinking. Long encounters with them may even change your perceptions about certain aspects of life. Be on the lookout for the following signs:
Curiosity
Narcissists want to have in-depth knowledge about their next victim. During conversations, they will always ask questions about you, which they will exploit later to their advantage.
Superiority complex
These con artists will feed you tones of information on topics you are not familiar with. The intention is to show how smart they are and how dumb you are. In the end, they will have exerted a form of influence over you, which is always their primary objective.
Creating fear and aggression
This is the weapon they use to get people’s attention and manipulate them eventually. Fear attracts negative energy, which is where they thrive best. They will also use your insecurities to mask their own. Though sad to say, deep down narcissists feel like the ugly duck. To cover this up and make themselves feel better, they will consistently bring up your insecurities during the conversations to make you feel inferior and bad about yourself.
An act of innocence
Narcissists are the sly fox, and that is how they end up taking the blame off them whenever they mess up. They have perfected the art of pretense so much that it is almost impossible to notice when they are putting on a show and when they are sincere (which rarely happens).
Narcissists will also twist information with made up stories that portray them as the helpless ones. They are always shifting the blame for their actions onto others including you.
Exerting unnecessary pressure on you
The primary goal is to render you emotionally unstable so that you can’t make independent sound decisions. You will notice once they start trying to comfort you right after ticking you off; though this might seem elusive since the emotional charge is in play.
How to Deal with Narcissists
You don’t have to be completely helpless against narcissists. Below are strategies to help you play their own game against them to prevent them from using you. The first step, however, is to identify these games narcissistic play first.
- Whenever they confront you with multiple questions, look them straight in the eyes. Eye contact makes them face the other direction. Only a sincere person can maintain a clear eye gaze.
- Change the conversation. Narcissists want to know a great deal of information about you. Don’t be too quick to give it to them. Slow them down by asking questions about themselves or changing the topic whenever they shift focus on you.
- Question more. Once they start showing off with figures and statistics, question the sources of their information. You will notice some skepticism, and gradually they draw away from you. This is one of the most effective ways to protect yourself from the games narcissists play. Don’t readily take in everything they present to you lest you fall victim to their scams.
- Have self-confidence. Narcissists prey on people who are less confident and have esteem issues. Work on your confidence so that when they come blowing their sense of self-importance, you can quickly shut them off.
- Loosen up a bit. If you get emotionally unstable quickly, try lighting up the mood. Whenever a narcissist tries to destabilize your emotions, go ahead and say something funny to shift the focus.
- Preserve your personal space. Don’t let just about anyone invade your personal space. If you have had enough of someone, it is prudent to tell them so or just distance yourself from them.
- Stay calm and decompress. You can do this either through meditation or just taking some time off. It is normal that there will always be people with more achievements than you have made. Do not let this get to you. Sit back and re-strategize on ways of living to your full potential without necessarily comparing yourself to others.
- Identify your insecurities. We all have a sense of insecurity one way or the other, and this is perfectly human. Know what your insecurities are and if you can’t fix them don’t let someone use them against you. This may be difficult, but once you get the hang of it, you become a stable, productive being.
The Bottom Line
Life comes with its challenges. The games narcissists play might overwhelm you, but you have to outsmart them. Eventually, its either you put them in their place, or you fall prey. To help these people, encourage them to attend psychological counseling. But as for you, stay safe from the games narcissists play.
Your present is a reflection of your past worldview. Take a look around! Everything you have today is the result of your thoughts and actions in the past. If you’re not happy with your life or have problems with relationships you probably need to consider a karmic relationship healing.
As long as you’re attached to your past you give your energy to it. Thereby you take away the energy from the present. When you’re constantly reflecting on memories in your head (no matter if they are pleasant or unpleasant) it leads to a biased perception of the present moment. The present moment, in turn, has an impact on what your future will be. If there is not enough energy in the present moment, it will be even less in the future. Thus, your thoughts about the past have an impact not only on your present but also creates an energy deficit in your future.
Karmic Relationship Healing And Chakras
Very often other people “pull” us into the past. It can be people that hurt us, people we hurt, people with whom we argued, people we broke up with, etc. The memories of these people (conscious or subconscious) take energy through the energy cords that block our chakras.
Energy cord is an energy channel, which is formed as a result of a violation of harmonious energy interaction of a person with other people and forms attachments.
Negative emotions form cords on the corresponding chakras.
The Danger Of Energy Cords
The energy cords are dangerous because they cause energy failures in the energy field: from slowing the flow of energy to its complete stop in a certain chakra.
In addition, the cords significantly aggravate the communication, depriving you of liberty, weaken your connection with your Higher Self, and inhibit your development.
If your negative emotions are very strong, they can form energy cords that can persist for several incarnations. Moreover, in each new incarnation, you will attract those souls with whom you have energy cords again and again. And this circle of incarnations among the same souls will continue until you release yourself from these cords. Such a circle of incarnations, tied to the same souls, is called ”karmic connection”.
It is the absence of attachments (energy cords) that is an indicator of a free spirit. Therefore, in order to fully and harmoniously develop, it is necessary to get rid of karmic cords and free yourself from attachments.
Liberation from the energy cords does not imply the destruction of the energy connection between people but means the acquisition of freedom at the disposal of one’s life. For example, freed from the attachment to parents, you will not stop loving them and will not lose their love, but will find a harmonious relationship without pressure and manipulation.
The Most Common Attachments
Now let’s take a look at the most common energy cords that can affect your life in a very negative way.
Resentment
This energy cord has a negative impact on health. When you feel offended, in your thoughts you return to your offender, again and again, thereby generously giving your vital energy to your offender.
Guilt
This cord is based on your aggression directed at yourself. When we feel guilty, we realize that we can not correct what we’ve done. In our mind, we constantly analyze the thoughts of how we can beg forgiveness from the one who we hurt, and what we can do to make amends. As a result of systematic analyzing of such thoughts, the energy cord is formed.
Jealousy, Dependence, Passion
These kinds of cords arise when one person has a need to possess another person. He constantly thinks about the object of his lust, dreams about it, passionately wanting to get what he wants. Such thoughts create a strong energy cord.
Unrequited love
This cord has a very strong negative impact on health. It pulls out a very large amount of energy from the one who loves, and the one who’s loved. Naturally, here we are talking about illusory love because true love is always unconditional and brings only positive emotions.
Revenge
This cord is created as a result of building a plan of revenge in your head.
Pity, desire to save
This kind of cord is formed by ego. It is the ego that thinks that you are a Savior and a hero, makes you think that you are doing a good job, constantly “hanging” other people’s problems on your shoulders, and thinking that without your help and support people cannot cope. However, at the energy level, a cord is formed, on which your energy flows away towards the person you are so desperately trying to save. Thus, you become a donor for the energy vampire. Such a binding blocks both: your own development (because you simply do not have enough energy for it) and the development of the person to whom you are so actively helping to solve problems (because you take away from him/her the necessary life lessons for evolution and spiritual growth). As a result, interfering in the life of another person, you form a strong karmic connection.
Parent cords
These cords are based on the desire to control your child. As a rule, parents explain their behavior with care and love, but this is a big mistake. Love cannot exist where there are an addiction and a desire to subjugate another person. Love lives only where freedom exists. If parents do not accept their child as an independent person and do not give him full freedom of self-realization, their energy completely blocks his main chakras, which prevents him from successfully building his personal life.
Karmic Relationship Healing Practice
No matter what kind of energy cords and attachments we have there is always something we can do. I’m talking about self-healing. Let me share with you a very powerful practice that provides a karmic relationship healing. This practice is aimed at the liberation from negative energy cords to a particular person.
First, you need to find out who you are attached to. Give yourself time to think about it. Who comes to mind most often? Write down the names of all the people you think about most often. After all, these are the people you have karmic cords with.
Now you have a list of people to whom you are energetically attached. Follow the practice below, starting with the first person on your list.
- Light a candle with the intention to get rid of negative energy cords to … (say the name and last name of the person).
- Take a relaxed position, close your eyes.
- Invite the Higher self of the person you’re trying to let go and heal your karma from. To do this, say three times: “I invite the Higher Self of … (name and last name of the person) for karmic relationship healing and for removing the negative energy cords that exist between us for the sake of our Highest Good.”
- Visualize in your imagination this person in front of you. Imagine how a Golden ray comes out of his (her) Solar Plexus Chakra and enters your Solar Plexus Chakra. Concentrate on that ray.
- Visualize that you’re looking into the eyes of the person. Say 8 times: “I sincerely forgive you for everything you’ve done!”
- Keep concentrating on the Golden Ray. This is your connection with the person. Through this ray, his (her) Higher Self receives messages from you in this meditation. Look into the eyes of the person, say 8 times: “Please forgive me for everything I’ve done!”
- Keep looking into the eyes of the person, say 8 times: “I sincerely and from the bottom of my heart thank you for everything you’ve done!”
- Now embrace this person in your imagination, and imagine the Golden-green ray of love coming out of your Heart chakra and going into his (her) Heart chakra. Accompany this ray with your love and words: “I love you!” (say 8 times).
- Now, in your imagination, move away from this person at arm’s length, and imagine how from each of your chakras to his respective chakras stretch cords similar to wires (there are seven of them).
- Pick up an imaginary lighter, light it and start annealing each cord, starting with the cord that connects your Muladhara chakras and finishing with the cord that connects your Crown chakras. Accomplish these actions with the words: “I completely forgive and let you go!» (8 times).
- Once you’ve annealed the last cord on your Crown chakras, imagine a wall of flame between you and the visualized person. At the same time, each of you is surrounded by a Golden cocoon of divine love. These Golden cocoons are healing all your wounds from annealing cords. Watch the flame between you, and as it burns, keep saying, “I’m letting you go!”.
- When the flame has dissipated, you will see yourself alone, surrounded by a Golden light, and realize that all the emotions and limitations that have been enclosed in the cords are only an illusion, a life lesson that you have passed.
- Thank the Universe for this lesson.
Slowly open your eyes.
The number of such practices for each case is individual. It depends on the binding force. Sometimes it is enough to do this practice just one time. But still, to consolidate the result, it is better to do it 8 times for each person you’re trying to heal your karmic relationship with.
It is desirable to do a karmic relationship healing with all your friends. Don’t worry, the communication with them won’t stop if you’re interested in it.
After this practice, the person with whom you severed the energy cords, will feel that you have stopped feeding him (her) with your energy and will try to remind you of himself (herself). It can be a phone call, e-mail, another attempt to put pressure on you or something else. In other words, he (she) will try to provoke you to get emotional about something, so that you, once again, under the influence of his provocation, give him your energy. He (she) will do his (her) best to restore the cords. In this case, try to behave kindly with him (her), do not succumb to provocations. After that repeat your karmic relationship healing practice with this person once again to fix the result.
The Bottom Line
You can do karmic relationship healing practice as many times as you need. Sometimes I feel that I need to do it again with the same people I already healed my karma from. Our life changes every second of our existence. Today we feel like we have no attachments but when tomorrow comes we may feel that our old attachments rise again. If you feel that communication with some people isn’t pleasurable for you anymore it means on energy level you have cords to these people. And through these cords, you’re losing your energy. Before you distance yourself from these people do yourself a favor – do a karmic relationship healing first. I’m sure you don’t want to attract the same kinds of communication problems in the future.
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