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What Is Your Fear Archetype And How Is It Holding You Back?

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Fear impacts all of us, and very often holds us back from pursuing the things we really want. If you are one of those people who let their biggest dreams fade away just because you are too afraid to pursue them, this article is for you! We are going to dig deeper and find out what this fear that holds you back looks like. You will learn what your fear archetype is and what you can actually do about it.

Destructive Power Of Fear

Fear is one of the basic human instincts that is supposed to protect us and make us act faster in dangerous situations. But at the same time, fear also inhibits and hinders our self-expression and progress. It is fear that can prevent us from living the life that we dream of and from expressing our full potential. So it turns out that this instinct of self-preservation can ruin our lives.

Everyone’s fear manifests itself in different ways, and people deal with it differently. Ruth Soukup, entrepreneur, and author of “Do It Scared” discovered seven fear archetypes and came up with the best ways to overcome each of them.

Which one describes yours the best? Read on!

7 Fear Archetypes

Fear Archetype #1: Procrastinator

Procrastinator Image

Also known as a perfectionist who tends to postpone things or not start them at all, because they are afraid to do everything imperfectly or make a mistake. And since it doesn’t work out perfectly in most cases, these people prefer not to take on a failed idea or project at all.

This archetype may manifest itself as:

  • fear of commitment;
  • fear of getting started.

Procrastinators tend to be indecisive when they need to act quickly. Usually, they prefer to plan everything in detail, do research, the organization of the process is more important than the actions themselves. As a result, they have many incomplete and unmanifested ideas and plans and rarely get anything done.

Are you a Procrastinator?

You can consider yourself a procrastinator if you:

  • never feel like things are done or ready if you like to plan things way in advance;
  • research tends to be more important than the action itself;
  • have trouble committing or saying yes to things that are outside of your comfort zone.

What can you do?

  • Get out of their comfort zone and say “Yes” more often to everything new, even if it is not planned.
  • Set a deadline for when your planning and researching period will end and when you’ll actually get started.
  • Realize that the problem with ‘perfect’ is that nothing will ever be good enough.
  • Set realistic standards and work towards doing your best.

Fear Archetype #2: The Rule Follower

fear archetypes image

Such people are dedicated to following the distinct rules and guidelines set by those around them. They’re obsessed with always trying to make the right decision, despite its potential effect on their own success.

The rule followers are very afraid of changes.

They tend to see the world in black and white and feel anxious anytime they sense themselves or other people stepping outside the norms of acceptable behavior. They may also be overly concerned with making sure other people are making good decisions.

The rule followers may avoid taking risks, especially when they are not sure whether there is a “right” path to follow, and their fear of authority may prevent them from coloring outside the lines of trusting their own judgment.

Are you the Rule Follower?

You can consider yourself the rule follower if you:

  • like knowing there is an established protocol to follow;
  • strongly prefer for things to be done the “right” way;
  • spend time worrying about regulations and things not being done correctly.

What can you do?

  • get out of the dual perception of the world, stop seeing everything as “either right or wrong”;
  • realize the fact that an unknown path can lead to something new and beautiful;
  • practice self-compassion;
  • realize that it’s OK to make mistakes – this is necessary for your personal growth;
  • define your own set of guiding principles instead of always leaning on others or outside factors.

Fear Archetype #3: The People Pleaser

People Pleaser Image

The desire to please everyone arises from a deep fear of being rejected by others. Such people care about what others think of them, and they are very afraid of public condemnation. The worst thing for such people is to be ridiculed or rejected by someone.

The people pleasers are afraid of being judged which also manifests itself as the fear of letting people down and the fear of what other people might say. Essentially, the People Pleaser’s biggest concern can often be summed up as the fear of how others may react.

Usually, they pay a lot of attention to their appearance and care a lot about their reputation and status symbols such as a nice car, home, or designer labels.

Are you the People Pleaser?

You can consider yourself the people pleaser if you:

  • have a hard time saying no, setting limits, and establishing healthy boundaries;
  • are overcommitted;
  • allow other people’s priorities and requests to override your own goals and dreams;
  • are often worried about looking foolish or being judged;
  • worry about letting other people down;
  • struggle to disagree when others share an opinion.

What can you do?

  • spend more time alone and learn to hear yourself first;
  • stop saying “yes” when you want to say “no”;
  • learn to set your boundaries when communicating with people;
  • realize that you can’t pour from an empty cup, meaning that when you’re in tune with your own wants and desires, you become a better friend, partner, and family member;
  • remind yourself that you deserve to be prioritized, just as much as other people in your life.

Fear Archetype #4: Outcast

7 Fear Archetypes Image

This is the opposite of those who try to please. Such people, on the contrary, try to be as different as possible, to show their individuality and the fact that they do not care about the opinion of others.

Behind all this is a huge fear of rejection or a fear of trusting other people. This fear archetype manifests itself by rejecting others before they have a chance to be rejected.

While to outside observers, the Outcast often appears to be fearless, inwardly he often believes other people can’t be counted on or trusted and he tends to view even the mildest slight or dismissal as confirmation of that belief, which in turn causes the Outcast to reject others even more frequently.

Are you an Outcast?

You can consider yourself an Outcast if you:

  • struggle to ask for help;
  • don’t trust others;
  • keep your distance from other people;
  • push people away and do not let them get too close;
  • tend to think “I don’t need anyone, I’m on my own”.

What can you do?

  • work on your self-esteem;
  • don’t be afraid to ask for help and express your feelings;
  • take the time to ask yourself if you are focusing on the worst-case scenario and what some other alternatives may be;
  • give others a chance;
  • look for evidence that you can trust others and know that if things don’t go well you are already experienced at ending a situation.

Fear Archetype #5: The Self-Doubter

Self-Doubter Image

This fear archetype is dominated by the fear of not being good enough. Those who self-doubt tend to feel insecure about themselves and their capabilities. Therefore, they can find it difficult to put themselves out there.

The Self-Doubter often judges others to mask his own fears and insecurities.

Such people may also struggle with feelings of intense jealousy toward someone who is doing the things they wish they could do. This jealousy may manifest itself in the form of sarcasm, gossip, or criticism.

These people are very insecure about themselves. In fact, they are afraid of themselves and their self-expression. Here there is a fear of the opinions of others, and the fear of not being good enough or not qualified enough.

Doubts prevent such people from starting something new. They doubt and criticize themselves and often envy those who succeed.

Are you the Self-Doubter?

You can consider yourself as the Self-Doubter if you:

  • avoid trying new things or taking risks because you don’t believe in yourself or your abilities;
  • often feel jealous;
  • frequently struggle with feeling unworthy or unqualified;
  • tend to be hypercritical of yourself and others.

What can you do?

  • start doing what you’ve always wanted to do and dreamed of, even if it seems scary;
  • step outside of your comfort zone every once in a while and take note of the outcome.

Fear Archetype #6: The Excuse Maker

Excuse Maker Image

This fear archetype struggles most with the fear of taking responsibility. It can also manifest itself as the fear of being held accountable, or the fear of being found at fault.

Instead of stepping up to lead every once in a while, the Excuse Maker finds himself taking a backseat to avoid accountability. They prefer to let others make decisions for them avoiding personal responsibility.

Such people are terrified of having the finger pointed in their direction. Therefore they always look for someone or something to blame for why they can’t do something.

Are you the Excuse Maker?

You can consider yourself as the Excuse Maker if you:

  • tend to shift blame and avoid responsibility;
  • get nervous at the idea of being in charge;
  • feel uncomfortable with making a final decision, for fear of being blamed for an unfavorable outcome;
  • are prone to blame any current struggles on other people or circumstances.
  • often have an explanation for why you are not able to do something.

What can you do?

  • start with setting small daily goals and stick with them;
  • try the S.M.A.R.T. (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Timely) goal model to help create measurable and realistic goals;
  • break down each of your goals – then you will be able to bring structure and trackability to them.

Fear Archetype #7: The Pessimist

pessimist fears image

This fear archetype struggles with the fear of adversity and hardship. Such people often feel victimized due to past or current trauma or difficulties. They can tend to look at hardships as stop signs or a reason to give up.

This fear archetype struggles most with the fear of adversity, which often manifests itself as the fear of pain.

Pessimists are easily waylaid by any challenging circumstances that come their way. This is due to the fact that they are very afraid of adversity and hardship. In difficult situations, they feel like they lack control over them.

In any challenging situation, the Pessimist only sees obstacles and troubles but never sees the opportunities for growth and perseverance. Any problem they face in life is a legitimate reason to give up or to not try at all.

Are you the Pessimist?

You can consider yourself as the Pessimist if you:

  • get stuck in bitterness toward other people or unfair circumstances;
  • struggle to face your circumstances head-on instead of preferring to hide to avoid additional pain;
  • fear of adversity and hardship;
  • tend to feel like there is no real solution for your problem and therefore would rather not try to solve it at all;
  • tend to look at hardships as stop signs or a reason to give up.

What can you do?

  • learn to look at hardships as stepping stones or lessons, instead of roadblocks;
  • see obstacles as an opportunity for growth and perseverance;
  • stop hiding trying to avoid pain;
  • get rid of victim mentality;
  • when something tough gets thrown your way, take a moment to step back and evaluate the situation;
  • when facing a challenge or problem, think about the lesson it might be teaching you, or how you can make the outcome more favorable.

The Bottom Line

Each of us can manifest all these archetypes, but some of them you may find particularly pronounced.

Did you recognize yourself in these fear archetypes? Well… Identifying the type of fear is the first step to overcoming it!

Personal Development

8 Signs You Are a Free Spirit Who Can Never Be Tamed

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If you are a free spirit, chances are you struggle to fit in your family or friend’s circles. That is normal. See, as a true spirit, you value your freedom over complacency. You would rather dictate the terms of your life than conform to societal norms.

Well, this nonconformist attitude to life is never free of cost. You may have to get out of your comfort zone, let go of your societal security, look different, and even suffer harm. But, how do you know if you are a free spirit and not just a rebellious person?

This article will discuss the 8 common signs to guide you.

But first:

Understanding the Free Spirit

A free spirit starts from the mind. You live free of domination from any oppressive thoughts, ideas, or notions imposed on you by others. Unlike rebellion, true freedom is about respectfully liberating your mind and body, to coexist with others at peace.

Likewise, a free spirit will not replace one oppressive thought with another. Instead, this person seeks the truth and lives by it. For example, many celebrities that claim to be free spirits are doing so superficially. They may still ascribe to certain notions that are oppressive to their audience. Like the idea of going organic but allowing the use of plastics from a certain brand.

The Signs

free spirit sigs image

If you are a true free spirit, then you can relate to most of the signs below: –

#1: Strong Desire for Freedom

Did you ever quit a well-paying job to pursue a digital nomad lifestyle that pays less than half of your salary? Your strong desire to be free and set your lifestyle standards indicates a truly free-spirited person. See, free-spirited people make lifestyle decisions that prioritize their freedoms.

#2: Abhor Restrictions

In line with a desire for freedom, free spirits despise any restrictions imposed by others in their lives. If you are one, you could be struggling with committing to a deadline, target, or relationship.

And for the career persons, free spirits hop from one organization to another, dreading to be confined at one company for too long. Here, the free spirit struggles to commit to another person or purpose but looks forward to waking up to new challenges or surprises.  

#3: Welcome Challenges

A free spirit encounters problems like any other person. However, they see the problems as new challenges, not threats. Consequently, a free spirit gets excited, not worried when facing challenges.

#4: Spontaneous

A free spirit comes up with rushed decisions that change the course of their lifestyles forever. For example, they may wake up and decide to shift to a new neighborhood, enroll in the gym, or make a swift financial investment. Or, they may change their minds about getting married, having kids, or setting up their businesses. 

These persons hold no attachment to anyone or anything, hence appearing as unserious. As a result, others find it hard to understand why this person can’t stay consistent. 

#5: Unconventionality

Free spirits do things their way. They question any societal expectations and are the last persons to adopt them. Likewise, they are never intimidated by those around them. Instead, they stick to their decisions regardless of how foreign they sound to the masses. 

#6: Insatiable

A free spirit is insatiable. Your goals are different, settling for a better or unique lifestyle from the one your peers are content with. For example, your dream when clearing college was never a well-paying job, the latest car, and a home with kids. Instead, you think of opportunities that will allow you to try new things.

For example, you could be a die-hard globetrotter even though you may not have the means to travel at the moment. You are the kind of person who is content with living from a suitcase for years as you travel around the world.

#7: Great Achievers, Innovators, Dreamers

Now, a free spirit may appear spontaneous and unserious with life, but they have a clear perspective of what they want to achieve. This person comes up with fresh ideas that promise to solve world challenges. And it is the excitement of this new challenge that fuels their desire to achieve the set goals.

wild and free image

#8: Relentless

Free spirits always seek ways of how to make the impossibilities in their lives possible. For example, they will question why it takes three days and not a day for an online shopping order to arrive at their doorstep. And, they will use the latest facts to question current theories.

In turn, these persons never quit. They appear stubborn, holding on to their ideas until they get the solution they were hoping for.

Living a Fulfilling Life as a Free Spirit

Note that, a free spirit is the best candidate for achieving spiritual awakening. This person is intent on soul searching and questions their existence. Still, the life of a free-spirited person can be a lonely one. If you suspect that you are a free spirit, here are a few tips to live a fulfilling lifestyle:

  • Spend more time outdoors. For example, taking part in dance competitions in the open gives you a chance to free your mind and release any stress buildup.
  • Reconnect with your inner child by working with children. They have great imaginations and love exploring and testing their boundaries. Plus, they enjoy doing role plays.
  • Explore a creative career path like preparing exotic dishes and painting on a canvas.
  • Most free-spirited persons are empathetic, considerate, kind, and loving. In turn, they can be victims of emotional abuse. Protect your emotional wellbeing by setting boundaries on who you interact with or what you explore beyond your comfort zone.

Conclusion

Anyone with a free spirit has the untamable spirit of a wolf. You always want to run free beyond the confines of family or society. You also have a tendency to oppose the normal social rule, being overly independent, and never subscribing to others’ rules. That’s why most free spirits are seen as rebellious.

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Personal Development

Shadow Work: Get To Know & Integrate Your Dark Side

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inner shadow work image

We need to be whole to live a fulfilling life. Yet, our shadow work represents the disconnected parts of our psyche, hindering our spiritual journey. And, at the spark of the moment, our unflattering past may emerge to tarnish this picture-perfect view of ourselves because, our shadows can go on autopilot mode, operating behind the scenes and impacting our relationships.

The Shadow: Home for Our Suppressed Traits

Did you grow up knowing that men are not supposed to cry? Or, do you view outspoken people as nosy? Well, as a human being, when you are overcome by grief or sadness, one quick release is to cry. It relieves the tension in you. Plus, those around you appreciate that you feel their grief too.

Likewise, an outspoken person can be a great leader if they use this trait to command authority for social justice or development. But, if you are born an outspoken person, and you relegate this positive trait, you lose out on living a fulfilled life.

The two examples above demonstrate what happens when we relegate any trait, whether positive or negative, that we disassociate from our ego. These traits never go away. They lie dormant in our shadows and may crop up in your life when you least expect them. More so, others can pinpoint those traits in you even without you doing anything to provoke it. For example, you may portray yourself as a composed person, only to throw tantrums at the slightest provocation. That shows there is unresolved anger lying dormant in your dark side.

Origin of the Term Shadow

The term “shadow” originates from the Jungian psychological model. According to Carl Jung’s theory, we all have an ego, which is the center of our personalities. Anything that you disassociate from your ego ends up in the shadow or your dark side. Similarly, if there is a trait that you dislike about yourself, chances are, it is suppressed in your shadow.

So How Do You Embrace Your Shadow?

inner shadow image

At a point when the shadow is working against us, it may destroy us. Hence, there is a need to embrace our dark side and use it to nourish our lives. But how do we achieve that?

Past vs. Present Approach to Embracing the Shadow

Now, history has records of ancient Greeks worshipping the shadow as an autonomous goddess or god. The Greeks used this approach to integrate the dark side into their egos. Not so with the 21st-century modern person. Today’s pressures from social media, family, and friends make us neglect our past wounds or negative impulses.

Many of us are too concerned about protecting our self-image. In the process, we deny that the shadow exists in the first place. Yet, cyberbullies and close friends are quick to pinpoint these shadows in others but never acknowledge their own. An issue of seeing a splinter in another person’s eye and not seeing the log in your own eyes, right?

Other Quick Tips to Embrace Your Shadow

  1. Have a calm mind. Life stress interferes with our attitudes towards the shadow. Yet, a collected person will find reason even in the most brutal aspects of their lives. Yoga, meditation, and crystal healing can help in achieving the right mindset for shadow work.
  2. Practice self-love. It will prepare you mentally to deal with the demons.
  3. Seek the truth, not validation. The dark side may have aspects of your life that are too painful.  Seek to understand the truth instead of wanting to feel special.
  4. Journalize the process.

Benefits of Shadow Work – Eliminating the Projection Defense Mechanism

When we repress our shadows, we project those feelings unto others. For example, if you view an overweight person as lazy, or find an outspoken person irritating, chances are you are struggling with weight management or a level of rudeness in your life.  Otherwise, if you were okay with your current or past weight, someone else’s oversize will not bother you.  See, this projection happens unconsciously, as a way to defend your ego.

inner work image

Shadow work unmasks our dark side and integrates it into our current life. It is about working with your disowned parts to bring out the creative, authentic, and energetic side in you. And, the benefits are tremendous.

Here are three key benefits: –

#1: Better Relationships

Integrating your dark side will ground and make you feel whole. Once you embrace your shadow, it is easier to embrace that of your spouse, child, friend, or workmate. In turn, you are less triggered by other person’s unpleasant behaviors. Even so, the grounding effect opens up channels of communication, hence improving how you relate with others.

#2: Clarity of Perception

Our perception of self determines how we view the world. If skewed, you will use the same lens of perception to sieve ideas, thoughts, and feelings from others. In contrast, integrating our shadows gives us a whole, true picture of ourselves. This realistic assessment of self results in self-awareness crucial for spiritual growth.

#3: Raised Energy and Better Health

For as long as you ignore your shadow, it becomes a burden that you carry each day. You know, you are cautious with the way you look, what you say, or how you conduct yourself, not to reveal those suppressed traits.

Integrating the dark side frees us from this daily struggle.

We discover a reservoir of energy that we never thought existed. In turn, we can focus on self-care routines that lead to better physical health.

Conclusion

We all have a dark side that we often want to ignore. The dark side could be the skeletons in your closet that you never want to admit. Or, positive traits like empathy, gentleness, humility that you feel make you look weak. Worse still, it could be demons from your past traumas, lingering in your present life like a shadow. We avoid these demons so as not to feel ashamed, guilty, or fearful. Yet, accepting and integrating this dark side into your current life could unlock a life of fulfillment and self-enlightenment. It is never easy to confront our shadows. But, it is worth your effort.

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Awareness

Soul Searching: Can You Really Find a Lost Soul?

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Soul Searching Image

Have you ever experienced a muscle pull while in deep waters swimming that you felt death was so close? How did you feel when you finally made it above the waters and took a deep breath? More like the breath of life, right? That is how we operate when we keep on holding to our past scars. They enslave us and suffocate our own existence. Luckily, soul searching can help you get back on track and start living your life just the way our creator intended.

So how do you find yourself? How do you finally let go of the past and live a free spirit? And most importantly, how do you stay focused to ensure you never find yourself in this situation ever again? Well, you’re on the right page because this article will answer these and many more questions revolving around soul searching.

Sounds interesting? Read on.

So What Is Soul Searching?

A student once asked his tutor:

“What did you gain from years of meditation?”

The teacher gently replied, “Nothing, my son. But let me share with you what I lost. I lost anxiety, depression, anger, and the fear of death, relationship insecurities, and the fear of growing older. Now I’m living a free spirit.”

Does this sound like one of your dreams? Soul searching helps you to achieve all that and more.  In simple terms, soul searching is an intuitive path to self-evaluation with an aim to find a deeper meaning and contentment in life. It’s that simple.

However, that doesn’t happen in a day, of course, but consistency yields long-term results.

Why Do You Need To Find Your Inner Self?

what is soul searching image

At some point in life, most people are conditioned to live in certain ways, to believe in certain truths, to practice certain careers, religions, etc. Sadly, most of these people actually die without ever figuring out what the other side of these truths feels like.

The significance of tapping into your inner self is that you immediately start to experience inner peace and balance in your daily life.

You see, once you tap into your inner self, you get to understand your life goals, your purpose, motivations, as well as beliefs and practices that add value to your life. As a result, you no longer waste your time and energy meandering in lost paths but instead, you fully focus your energy on paths that you’re destined to excel in. And isn’t that what we all want?  

4 Practical Ways You Can Find Your Soul

#1: Take A Self-Realization Quiz

Start asking questions like:

  • Is this the actual truth or the truth I want to hear?
  • Is this a healthy relationship or the relationship the world needs to see?

And I’m almost certain you’re here because you’ve already started questioning yourself. So this step will be easy. However, the hardest part is accepting you for who you have become now and working towards changing this narrative moving forward.

I always believe we shouldn’t work so hard at hiding the past but rather take the lessons and use them to create a better future.

#2: Experience The Other Side Of Life For Just A Day

In other words, dare your ego. What have you denied yourself for the longest time in your life all in the pretext of being the “perfect human”? Is it the career you never fulfilled, or the trip you’ve always postponed? It’s time to dare what you consider impossible.

However, let me warn you that your ego will fight you harder. Remember that inner voice that tells you “you can’t ware that Suzie, your belly is too visible” or “you can’t get that mortgage Jack, you’ll be bankrupt before you even retire”.

We’ve all had those moments, haven’t we? Sadly we just nod to our ego and say “I think you’re right, let me find an alternative.”

And by the way, did you know you can overcome some fears just by approaching life in a different angle? For example, a bungee jump, or sky diving can help you overcome your fear of the unknown.

#3: Time to Connect With Your Higher Self

Connect With Your Higher Self Image

Did you know that your higher self might be trying to communicate with you but you might be blocking its voice? It’s true. That’s why you are suddenly craving a more meaningful life. Suddenly you are starting to see all the missed opportunities. For this reason, you need to pause and listen.

The easiest way to reconnect with a lost soul is through meditation. However, the modern world is too distracting. Instead of fighting the distractions, how about embracing the things you admire in life. Take a walk in the forest, or go deep-sea diving, or even explore your hobbies and find that spot where your mind is mostly at peace. That is when you reach out to your higher self.

#4: Professionals Could Help Too

Some things are above self-help. This is where you need to engage professional help. Be it your Yoga instructor, a therapist, or any professional practitioner within your line of trouble.

Other times, you just need to open up to someone you trust. Someone you can share your past traumas openly without the fear of being judged. Consequently, healing starts.

Moving Forward

Once you find your true self, it’s time to change the narrative. In the self-realization quiz, cross off any character traits you possess that are pulling you backwards. If it’s the shyness, the extreme anger, or the low self-esteem, cross it off and purpose to work on improving these areas henceforth.

One thing I must mention though, change takes time. But as long as you don’t lose your zeal, it can be achieved. Find new goals and new motivation. Let these propel you towards living your new life.

Always remember, not all storms come to disrupt your dreams; some are there to clear your path.

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The Most Accurate Horoscope for June 2021

This article will share with you the most accurate horoscope for June 2021 based on the Feng Shui flying stars chart. This horoscope includes predictions for different spheres...

Abundance Haircuts In June 2021 Image Abundance Haircuts In June 2021 Image
Abundant Living3 weeks ago

Abundance Haircuts In June 2021: Good And Bad Days To Cut Your Hair

Abundance Haircuts is a little-known sutra that reveals the negative consequences of cutting your hair on the bad days and the incredible benefits of cutting it...

Gemini personality image Gemini personality image
Astrology3 weeks ago

Everything You Need To Know About Gemini Personality

Symbolized by the celestial twins, this air sign was interested in so many pursuits that it had to double itself....

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