Awareness

What Is Echoism? The Silent Response to Narcissism Explained

Published

12 months ago

July 12, 2021

If you have an active narcissistic parent, spouse, sibling, or leader figure in your life, you may find yourself losing your voice in the relationship. Your true identity is either completely stripped away, or never gets a chance to nurture and take root. In turn, you find yourself always agreeing with what the narcissistic person says. Dr. Craig Malkin, a psychologist, researcher, and author, popularized the term “Echoism” to describe this behavior.

This article will share with you what echoism is, what its signs are, and how you can recognize an echoist.

The Origin: The Greek Mythology, Echo

Before we discuss “what is echoism?” we need to understand its origin. A story is told about the Curse of Hera explaining the origin of echoism as follows: –

The Couple

Goddess Hera was the wife of Zeus. God Zeus was attracted to nymphs. He would frequent earth to have affairs with them. His escapades made Hera jealous. She was determined to catch her husband red-handed. Hence, she followed him around Mount Cithaeron, watching his every move.

The Plan

On recognizing this, Zeus came up with a plan to occupy his wife. He engaged Echo, a mountain nymph residing at Mount Cithaeron, to have long chats with Hera. That way, he would have ample time to get away and continue with his affairs unnoticed.

Still, eventually, Hera recognized what was happening. Out of fury, she cursed Echo to never speak her mind ever again. Instead, Echo would only repeat the most recently spoken words of another person.

One day, while Echo was up and about all alone in the woods, she saw and fell in love with a charming young man by the name of Narcissus. Narcissus was hunting deer in the forest and had roamed away from his colleagues. Echo followed Narcissus silently, unable to share her fondness for him. Yet soon enough, as luck would have it, Echo found an opportunity to do so.

See, Narcissus would call out to his buddies by asking, “Is anyone there?” And, Echo would use this chance to repeat the question, to catch Narcissus’ attention. Upon hearing her, Narcissus shouted, “Let’s come together.” For he thought it was his mates who had replied to him. Instead, Echo reiterated these words while racing towards Narcissist. But Narcissist rejected her, leaving her in despair.

The Ending

Later on, Narcissus would pass by a lake and catch a glimpse of himself. He fell in love and became obsessed with his image. Unable to move on, Narcissus ended up dying there, leaving Echo in desperate mourning. Eventually, Echo died too but left her voice behind.

The Lesson

In a nutshell, the above Greek mythology summarizes the events of Echo, who was the original victim of a narcissist. And isn’t this what we see happening to our society every day? Love-entanglements that lead to murder or suicide?

Echoism in the 21^st Century

Despite echoism originating centuries earlier, it is only until the year 2015 that Dr. Greg Malkin came up with the term Echoism. In his book, Rethinking Narcissism: The Secret to Recognizing and Coping With Narcissists, Malkin views echoism as a direct effect of being in a relationship with a narcissist. Today, psychologists observe that there are a growing number of people with echoism.

What Is Echoism?

Echoism is a new word in the world of mental health which involves people losing their sense of self as they constantly try to “prop up” those with more inflated egos in their life.

Narcissism vs. Echoism

Narcissism and echoism are two extreme behaviors on the same spectrum. On one hand, narcissists come out as selfish, show grandiosity, are in constant need of admiration, and view themselves as better than everybody else. In contrast, echoists portray the opposite of narcissism. They are always afraid of feeling special, standing out, or expressing their needs. Instead, they forfeit their interests for the sake of others.

How Does Echoism Develop?

Interestingly, the relationship between a narcissist and an echoist starts with the narcissist “rescuing” the echoist from a situation that is not good. Think of that narcissistic spouse who rescues their partner from losing their home to auctioneers. Or, it could be a narcissistic leader using their influence to secure a job for a fresh college graduate.

However, this altruistic narcissist manipulates the echoist to pay back this gesture by obliging to all their demands.

Since most echoists grow up in a narcissistic relationship, they feel they owe the narcissist. In turn, they will do and speak whatever the narcissist dictates. Narcissists love such behavior because, they get to be the center of attention.

The Signs

Now that we understand what is echoism, what are the tell-tale signs? Well, you can identify an echoist if this person: –

Is an extreme people pleaser.
Struggles to accept compliments or praise of any kind. Here, instead of saying thank you, they will reflect or ignore the compliment.
Is an excellent listener but never shares their problems with anyone. These are the persons you run to when you need to offload your problems, yet they never seem to have a bad day.
Hates being the center of attention.
Defines their identity as per what the narcissist dictates.
Is quick to take the blame when things go wrong.
Fears being seen as needy, hence, never asks for favors.
Is in constant search for validation but rarely ever gets it. Hence, this person revolves in a cycle of seeking out people to get that validation.
Tends to look for someone who will boost their self-esteem. This other person ends up putting their own needs behind the needs of the narcissist too.
Represses their feelings to support other people. They never focus on themselves or allow anyone to focus on them.
Feels the urge to give everything they have in return for affection from the narcissist. In contrast, they sacrifice their all as a way to express their love.

Echoism vs. Empathy vs. Introversion

Regrettably, many people dismiss the above signs of echoism, mistaking them for an empath or an introvert. Yet, the two are quite different. Indeed, most echoists are quite intelligent and successful persons. They may be nice and supportive but never doormats.

Moreover, a lot of echoists are capable of making independent decisions. And, should you raise an alarm about their behavior, they may even get upset. To them, this is not a big deal.

Secondly, whereas introverts like to be quiet and overthink most aspects of their lives, echoists depict introverted ways only because they learned that it is unsafe to express them.

The Bottom Line

If you are in a toxic relationship that makes you become an echoist, you ought to free yourself from it as soon as possible. For, echoism leads to unhealthy boundaries and habits that can hinder your development. Seek professional help and begin your journey of narcissistic abuse recovery.

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Astrology

Feng Shui Astrology For July 2022: What to Expect This Month?

Published

5 hours ago

June 29, 2022

Katya Ki

Feng Shui Astrology For September 2021 Image

Feng Shui astrology is based on the Chinese calendar. The dates of the beginning and the end of the months are different from those generally accepted in the Gregorian calendar. According to the Chinese calendar, the year’s fourth month starts on July 7th and ends on August 7th. Therefore, all the recommendations given in this article will be accurate until August 7th.

Feng Shui astrology believes that each month has its unique energy and character. Therefore, each month’s energy is expressed through one of the 12 Zodiac animals and connected to one of the five elements.

July 2022 is the month of the Fire Goat. In this article, I will share what kind of energy and events to expect in July 2022 and how to properly choose dates for different events.

Feng Shui Astrology for July 2022

The Energy of the Month of the Fire Goat

According to the Chinese calendar, July 2022 is ruled by the Fire Goat.

In Chinese mythology, the Fire Goat is an image of red-hot embers crackling merrily on the fire. Under the influence of July’s energies, people may have an increased desire to be the center of attention at any cost. This tendency may make them more artistic, charismatic, overly emotional, excitable, and even irritable. People can also lie more often and embellish their own achievements.

So, the month promises to be quite hot, both literally and figuratively. Hot and dry weather often drives people crazy, so if you feel emotional tension, try to be more patient and practice mindfulness. Don’t react to possible conflict or problems immediately. Take your time to calm down and cool off first. Also, try to avoid being in the sun too much this month. It may increase the Fire element which could bring more emotional intensity to your life. This month, it is especially beneficial to spend time close to the water – by the lakes, rivers, or ocean. Even swimming in the pool can help to cool down the excessive Fire element.

Southeast is the most dangerous direction for traveling this month. This recommendation only applies to long-distance trips. It is ok to take a walk or move around the city or close to it in the Southeast direction.

Auspicious Days In July 2022

July 13th and 25th are good dates for starting long-term affairs. The projects started on this date do not promise rapid development, but they will bring stable, reliable results. However, these dates are not suitable for those born in the year of the Rooster.

July 15th is a good date for official openings, signing deals or contracts, making agreements, and purchasing a property. However, this date is not suitable for those born in the year of the Boar.

Days With a Higher Risk of Getting Viruses And Other Contagious Diseases

July 14th and 26th – during these dates, it’s easier to get a disease. Therefore, make sure you’re being extra cautious these days, as there is an increased risk of getting infections and viruses!

Inauspicious Days In July 2022

July 11th, 18th, 23th, 30th, and August 4th are unfavorable dates to start important things. They bring difficulties, obstacles, and problems.

July 16th and 28th are not suitable dates for a lot of activity, organizing important events, or starting medical treatment. But you can use these dates to complete old cases.

August 6th is “Exhausting Day”. The energy potential of this day is very weak. Therefore, try to avoid any big activity on this day.

Feng Shui Astrology For July 2022: Check Out Your Bagua Sectors

If you are new to Bagua, make sure to read my articles:

Feng Shui Bagua: 8 Aspirations

The Feng Shui Bagua Map: How to Use It?

According to Feng Shui astrology, each of the nine sectors of your house is influenced by a certain type of energy. This energy changes from month to month, from year to year. In this particular article, I will not be talking about the annual chart but focusing on the energy influence of the month.

Now let me share with you Feng Shui Astrology for July 2022!

Center

The central part of the house brings wealth luck, good fortune, and intellectual prowess in July. Activate your luck by placing the Jade Emperor Windchime here. However, the overriding annual chi of the 5 Yellow obstructs good luck and can cause health problems. Therefore, make sure you protect yourself by placing the Supremacy of Heaven Plate, the Heart Sutra Pagoda, and the Wu Lou with Joyous Cranes here.

Northwest

The Northwest sector brings accidents, violence, risk of money loss, and betrayals this month. At work, office politics can become a problem if your office is located in the Northwest corner. Be careful of the people you are working with this month. To suppress the negative influence of this sector, place the Anti-Robbery Plaque here and carry the Kuan Kung on Horseback Anti-Betrayal Amulet.

West

Feng Shui Astrology for July 2022 promises a prosperous month to the residents of the West sector and those whose front door is facing the West. To activate prosperity energy in your house, display the 100 Blessings Energetic Deer in this sector. However, remember to protect your West sector from the annual Loss Star by displaying the Anti-Robbery Plaque here.

Northeast

Feng Shui astrology for July 2022 promises good fortune, commercial success, wealth, promotion, and career luck to those residing in the Northeast rooms. Activate your success luck by displaying the Completion Horse in this sector. If you play in the stock market or take any kind of gamble, display the Wealth Lock Mini Plaque in the Northeast corner of your office or in the Northeast sector of your house (or living room).

South

Feng Shui astrology for July 2022 promises an excellent month to those residing in the South rooms and whose houses are facing the South direction. You will have career advancement and leadership luck this month. To activate the lucky energies of this sector, display the New Victory Banner here.

North

The North sector gets afflicted by the Illness Star, sapping the energy of those who reside here. If your bedroom is located in this sector, make sure you display the Wu Lou by your bedside and carry the Stay Healthy Amulet at all times. Pregnant women should consider moving to another bedroom this month.

Southwest

Feng Shui Astrology for July 2022 promises a quarrelsome month to those residing in the Southwest rooms or whose houses are facing Southwest. The energy of this sector brings conflicts, gossip, arguments, and even legal entanglements. To neutralize the quarrelsome energies, display the Magical Cosmic Apple here. Also, remove anything that makes too much noise from this sector (windchimes, TV, stereo, etc.).

East

The East is favorable for studying and writing this month. This sector can also help attract noble people, patrons, and mentors. Also, it can attract investors to your business. If you have an office in this sector, it may bring you promotion luck. To activate your success luck, display Feng Shui Dragon Carp with 3-Legged Toad Mini Plaque in the East sector of your house.

However, if your bedroom is located here, there is a possibility of romantic scandals caused by the presence of a third party and emotional stress due to relationship problems. To protect your relationship, display the Marriage Lock in the East sector of your house.

Southeast

The Southeast part of your house is a very dangerous area this month! If you and your family spend lots of time here, you will find everyone becoming stressed and short-tempered this month. It also increases the likelihood of sickness, accidents, and misfortune. Try to avoid spending time in this area if possible. To suppress the misfortune energies, display the Heart Sutra Pagoda and Wealth Lock Mini Plaque here.

Feng Shui Astrology For July 2022: Bonus Tip

For sectors of the home where good energy resides, it is excellent to activate with plenty of noisy activity. Have the radio, TV, or fan placed here to churn up the energy so there is a good level of noise. Also, it is very favorable to install brighter lights in these sectors. Moving the energy in these ways will encourage yang chi to manifest to your advantage.

Abundant Living

Abundance Haircuts In July 2022: Good And Bad Days To Cut Your Hair

Published

2 days ago

June 27, 2022

Katya Ki

Abundance Haircuts In September 2021 Image

Abundance Haircuts is a sutra based on the Tibetan calendar. It reveals the negative consequences of cutting your hair on the bad days and the incredible benefits of cutting it on the good days. Dates of Abundance Haircuts are calculated according to extremely complex formulas by experienced Feng Shui Masters.

Most people in the Western world have never heard about abundance haircuts. While for Eastern people, it’s not a new practice. This article will share this powerful sutra and give you a calendar for abundance haircuts in July 2022, with good and bad days for haircuts. Pay attention to what day you’re picking for your next hair appointment – only choose good days for abundance haircuts in July 2022.

Why Is Hair So Important?

Since ancient times, people have given hair a sacred meaning. It was thought that people could connect with the Universe through one’s hair. Hair serves as “antennas” and “guides” between our world and the world of Heaven. And so far, this knowledge has not lost its relevance. Hair connects us with Higher forces, cosmic energy, God, and Higher consciousness. By connecting through the hair to the Cosmos, we can fill ourselves with the energies of abundance and health.

Good Days to Cut Your Hair In July 2021 image

There were many beliefs associated with hair; some of them have survived to the present day. For example: in any case, you should not get a haircut by yourself, as in this case, deformation of your energy field may happen, which can lead to health problems and energy loss. It is also not recommended to get a haircut on the days of a lunar or solar Eclipse: the hair can suffer, weaken, and lose shine and volume.

What Are “Abundance Haircuts”?

It has long been known that there are days when it is especially favorable to cut hair. Among these days, there are days of “Abundance haircuts.”

Abundance haircuts are a special ritual to attract abundance flows into your life. It is good to say abundance affirmations and mantras on this day. So you will strengthen the ritual haircut and make it a more effective and efficient force.

Here are examples of the mantras:

For wealth and abundance: OM TARE TUTTARE TURE MAMA BASU PUSHTIM KURU SOHA
Mantra for vitality and life force increase: OM TARE TUTTARE TURE MARITSE YE TSE BHRUM NRI DZA SOHA
For fame, power, and charisma: OM TARE TUTTARE TURE BODHI CITTA SOHA
Mantra for health and longevity: OM TARE TUTTARE TURE MAMA AYUR PUNYE JNANA PUSHTIM KURU YE SOHA
For magnetism and attractiveness: OM TARE TAM SOHA

If you are not a mantra practitioner, you can use affirmations instead.

Examples of abundance affirmations:

I deserve to be abundantly happy and healthy!
My abundance is constantly growing!
I always have money for everything I need!
Money comes to me easily and fast!
I’m grateful for my abundant life!

Abundance Haircuts In July 2022

Spirituality

Spiritual Alchemy: Transmuting Into a Higher Version of Yourself

Published

5 days ago

June 24, 2022

Katya Ki

Spiritual Alchemy is a mystical practice that seeks to free the soul from its attachment to matter. It is an ancient and traditional practice that aims to offer spiritual transformation and growth, yet it has no interest at all in material growth.

Spiritual Alchemy traces its roots in medieval times, where the goal was to obtain gold. At that time, Alchemy was practiced by people who wanted to transform base metals such as lead into gold. The idea behind this was to amass more wealth.

Today, the practice is used to achieve:

Personal contentment;
Self-awareness;
Harmony;
And liberation from the inauthentic parts of your life.

Simply put, the goal is to achieve self-actualization and spiritual rebirth. Let’s have a more detailed look at the concept of Spiritual Alchemy below.

The Stages of Spiritual Alchemy

There is a journey people go through to achieve their spiritual rebirth. It is essential to know that everyone’s spiritual journey is different. Therefore, the stages of spiritual Alchemy may vary slightly from one person to another.

Stage 1: Calcination

This first stage of spiritual Alchemy is also called the black stage. The black represents chaos in which we have buried ourselves. Calcination involves eliminating parts of our lives that prevent us from attaining our happiness. It also entails identifying the elements that no longer serve you and burning them into ashes.

People focus on being perfect rather than truly happy in the modern world. These societal standards prevent people from exploring themselves authentically.

In the calcination stage, we begin to break free from:

Self-doubt;
Fear;
Self-sabotaging tendencies;
Pride;
Arrogance;
Ego.

Liberating yourself from these tendencies allows you to explore what you are underneath the cover – the authentic you.

Calcination also involves detaching ourselves from world attachments such as the desire for wealth, power, and identity. Note that these are not bad things. However, to achieve spiritual rebirth in occult sciences, you must know where to draw the line.

Stage 2: Dissolution

This second stage involves dissolving the ashes into the water in occult sciences.

Dissolution involves not associating yourself with the inauthentic you. You have already freed yourself from elements of self-doubt and pride. It is now time to observe the negative and positive traits objectively.

At this stage, we are more objective. You can therefore pinpoint how your actions affect you and others. In this stage, you can also notice how avoidant you have been. For instance, many people avoid being themselves and hide in alcoholism, codependency, workaholism, social media, gambling, sex, or TV binging.

This stage is also often triggered by severe life events such as divorce, job loss, death, or bankruptcy. We describe this stage as one that allows you to stop, smell the roses, and pay attention to what you are doing.

Stage 3: Separation

Emotional Healing From Narcissistic Abuse Clear Boundaries Image

The separation stage is written in the air element. The first two stages are associated with fire and water.

In a mystical sense, this stage can involve separation from your thought processes or emotional trigger responses. This separation process allows you to distinguish authentic essence from acquired personality. This is a very liberating stage as it allows you to come free from resentment towards yourself.

Separation is a very satisfying stage where we free ourselves of resentment towards ourselves and others. Liberation from our negative emotions allows us to become more aware of our true feelings. However, the separation only occurs when we no longer identify with the character we have been playing and get in touch with our true selves.

Stage 4: Conjunction

The first three stages let you get rid of the inauthentic self. What happens to the authentic parts of you that remain?

You put them into great use in the conjunction stage. In this stage, we combine the tiny bits of our true self to form one harmonized self. This is coming together under the earth element as it is an embodiment process that supports the materialization of the spirit.

In this stage, you begin to feel harmonized in body and soul but still able to point out the different strands that make you a whole.

Stage 5: Fermentation

This is the beginning of spiritual rebirth. Fermentation describes the decomposing of one’s old self and the renewal of your new true self. The first four stages involved discarding inauthenticity and harmonizing authenticity. However, this stage involves now basking in our authenticity. We can link this stage to a rebirth of the phoenix from its ashes.

This stage can be categorized into two:

Putrefaction – the decaying of our former selves
Spiritualization – relieves us from the old world and allows us to see life from a new perspective

It is a stage accompanied by inner peace and contentment.

Stage 6: Distillation

So what next after going through the spiritualization phase? It is time to integrate the spiritual life and make it more permanent. Distillation is a level of purification that furthers the cleansing within ourselves. This purification process results in inner solid transformation and peace. It is a stage where you now understand your spiritual rebirth, self-realization, and enlightenment.

Stage 7: Coagulation

This is a stage where you have finally broken free from your mind. Here, you are connected to your soul and higher consciousness. This is like the meeting point of two complete opposites, such as hell and heaven or life and death. At this stage, the core of your existence is self-awareness; we are one body with our spirit.

However, you must note that we are not separate from the physical universe at this stage. We are one with the spirit but still a reflection of the physical universe.

The Bottom Line

Everyone’s journey is different but will somehow shape itself through the seven stages. These spiritual alchemy steps are a great way to build a new self. The idea behind Alchemy is that you can transform something into something more valuable. Just like the foundation was to transform metals into gold, you too can transform into a higher version of yourself. In addition, letting go of the burdens that hold you back will help you achieve the highest level of spirituality.