What is Social Anxiety?
The Physiological Manifestations of Social Anxiety.
Social anxiety is the feeling of being out of control. Your body can morph into a state of crisis and go into fight or flight mode. Physiological changes can make it debilitating to adequately perfuse oxygen to the brain, leaving minimal space for rational thinking.
This, in combination with rapid heartbeat and fast-paced breathing, can create a recipe for disaster. You may feel like you want to pass out. Suddenly you’re becoming increasingly aware that everyone is watching you, judging you, curious about this phenomenon of physiological changes happening right before their eyes.
Heightened Awareness.
You become hyper-aware of EVERYTHING. Even the things that are most mundane. What you were nervous about before is heightened by all the chatter of voices around you, the various inflections in tone. You feel as though you’re being closed in on, and all you can think of is, “how can I get out of here?” If you could peel your skin off and step outside of your body to get away, you would.
But while all the oxygen is pumping to your brain to keep you alert and aware, only worsening your anxiety, and increasing your awareness of how awkward you (perceive yourself) to appear to those in the near vicinity, there is so little blood in your feet that they are planted firmly in place – you’re frozen and cannot move.
Not Just Shyness.
Social anxiety is not just your average shyness. It’s a gut-wrenching disorder that prevents you from being able to find focus and think clearly, as your thoughts just buzz uncontrollably outside your mind and you can’t contain or tame them.
Can you relate to this?
If So, Here Are 6 Tips to Squash Social Anxiety
#1
Address It. Embrace It. Release It.
Like anything, the first step is to address that the problem exists. “I have social anxiety. But social anxiety doesn’t define me and I CAN overcome this.” After you get behind this, then you can progress forward to the next reassuring fact, which is: You’re not alone! About 7% of the US population is experiencing social anxiety right now. It’s much more common than it’s perceived to be.
#2
Do Not Avoid Social Situations
The best way to beat it is to face it, and face it often. Every time you’re asked out to go to lunch with your colleagues, take them up on it. Be amongst the people! You will indeed feel nervous the first time around, but it gets easier with each offer you take your buds upon to go out. If at first, you don’t succeed, try again. Fake it until you make it. Whatever your mantra, you’ve got this!
#3
Get In with a Support Group
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) has been proven immensely successful in helping people overcome their social anxiety disorder. CBT will significantly help empower YOU to gain back control. You will learn techniques to break bad hardwiring and redirect those neurological pathways so that your brain produces and maintains more healthy connections – and that leads to more positive outcomes.
#4
Don’t Look Back – You’re Not Going That Way
In order to prevent relapsing, keep moving forward! Don’t wallow in the could-have-been outcomes: “If I’d only expressed confidence in that situation, I might not have missed out on the opportunity.” Every step forward, no matter how small, is progress. Progress is what produces positive results, results in fuel change, change breaks bad habits, and this in turn catapults you forward down a more satisfied, happy path.
#5
Say Yes
Whether it’s “yes” to meeting new people, being amongst colleagues in a meeting you were asked last minute to join, or exchanging small talk with the barista at your favorite coffee stop – say YES! Each social interaction offer accepted is an opportunity to continue to grow. It will help you live a more abundant life because you will embrace and love you for you.
#6
Self-Care.
Practice daily self-care: breathing techniques, meditation, yoga, go for a run. Whatever your passion is, if it involves you, great! Exercise is especially beneficial as it raises your body’s feel-good hormones called endorphins, giving you more energy and fueling the mind with more positive thoughts. It works as a great way to kick off the day by way of these mindful breathing and meditation techniques, and it releases pent-up stress and racing, nagging thoughts after a long workday.
There is No Shame.
Social anxiety can still seem to be a bit taboo, but it’s becoming less of that, as more people step out from the shadows. Please remember that it’s important not to avoid situations that can trigger the anxiety. This is key, as is getting in with a group of fellow peers who are experiencing similar feelings and emotions.
You’ve Got This!
None of this is a quick overnight fix. It requires consistency and persistence with continuous forward movement in order to overcome social anxiety. With awareness, a reliable support group, self-love, and mindfulness, it can be beat.
Have no regrets, continue moving forward, take care of yourself, and take others up on their offers to socialize. Just know you can and will do this!