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Love

5 Simple Steps To Boost Your Self-Love

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All of us have heard about the importance of loving ourselves. We are well aware that self-love is the key to success, harmony, and abundant living. Until we learn how to love ourselves we can’t spiritually develop.

Theoretically, it would seem that everything is so clear and simple. But when it comes to practice, we all face difficulties.

So what is self-love?

The first thing we learn from any master class or book on positive thinking is that we have to love, respect and accept ourselves. Without this, we can’t develop. But when it comes to practice, the big question arises: “What does it mean to love yourself

Self-love is the foundation on which our whole life is built. If this foundation is not strong enough or does not exist at all, then our whole life is very shaky and unreliable. It can collapse at any time. In order to avoid this, we need to learn to love ourselves.

Unfortunately, many people are convinced that loving yourself means being selfish or narcissistic. However, it is not like that at all. Self-love and selfishness or narcissism are completely opposite concepts. To love yourself means to accept yourself and to realize your divine nature. To be selfish or a narcissist means to put your ego on display.

Moreover, if we can’t love ourselves, we can’t love anyone. If we can’t love the closest and dearest person in the world – ourselves – how can we love someone else? It can be passion, affection, but not love. Love always comes from the inside, and only when it overflows us, it pours out to the outside.

5 Steps Towards Self-Love

Step 1: Acceptance

smiling young woman image

Accept yourself as you are! Whatever mistakes you made in your life, accept them and don’t judge yourself. Everything happened the way it was supposed to happen. And you did what you had to do. Respect the choices that you have made in the past and that you are making now.

Accept what you don’t like about yourself. Realize that what you call “imperfections” are actually your unique qualities that fall out of the scope of the “standard.” We have been taught since our childhood to be like everyone else. And everything that distinguished us from others was condemned. But it shouldn’t be that way! We must learn to be ourselves without any limitations. We need to learn to perceive our “imperfections” as unique manifestations of ourselves.

Step 2: Self-Sufficiency

Realize that no one or nothing can make you whole. You’re already self-sufficient! You need to learn to love yourself regardless of whether someone else loves you or not. Your happiness cannot be dependent on your relationships.

Besides that, many people believe that certain achievements in life will help them love themselves more. But this is far from reality! Neither a career, nor an expensive car, nor a luxurious mansion on the beach, nor designer clothes, will make you love yourself. All this luxury can only enhance your ego, but self-love will never depend on such things. And it is very important to understand this!

You don’t need a reason to love yourself. True love is always born for no reason. We start to love ourselves just like that, here and now, just the way we are.

Step 3-Destruction Of The Pedestals

young redhead curly lady looking at mirror image

Stop putting people on the pedestal. Stop thinking that someone might be better than you are or worse. Learn not to compare yourself to other people. If you accept and love your uniqueness (which, as I have already said, consists of those qualities that society calls “imperfections”), then you realize that any comparison is inappropriate! You are who you are. No one is better or worse than you. Destroy all the pedestals that you have created. And understand that all people are equal. Don’t idealize anyone. We’re all just humans – nobody is perfect! Besides that the ideal is always dead, there is no movement, there is no need for development. So throw away all those thoughts about reaching this illusional ideal level of yourself. Stop this race to perfection! It doesn’t make any sense!

Step 4-Self-Respect

Self-love can’t exist without self-respect. Learn to respect yourself, your time and space!

Free your space from negative people, as well as from those people with who you are uncomfortable with or who are not interesting for you to communicate with. Free yourself from those people who steal your energy. Stop talking to people who only talk about themselves, but are never interested in you. Change your environment! As soon as you free yourself from people you don’t resonate with, you will attract a new environment into your life. From now on surround yourself only with people you enjoy interacting with.

Sometimes we can’t explain to ourselves why we don’t resonate with someone. I would advise not even try to find out the reasons why, but just keep a person you don’t resonate with at a distance. You should trust your intuition. If you don’t want to interact with someone without any particular reason, it means that you subconsciously (intuitively) feel that this person can bring nothing but problems into your life!

Step 5 – Alignment

Beautiful young woman blowing dandelion flower Image

Live in alignment with yourself. Don’t do things you don’t want to. I am not talking about everyday duties that cannot be avoided. I am talking about things that don’t resonate with our beliefs and contradict our worldview. For example, when we go to dinner though we don’t want to. And we doing it only because we don’t want to offend someone who invited us. Or, when the seller starts to impose on us some product that we do not need at all, but we buy it because we don’t want to upset the seller. These kinds of acts destroy our self-respect and our authority in our own eyes!

Remember that every time you step over yourself in order to not offend someone, you show a deep disrespect for yourself and the absence of self-love.

The Bottom Line

It is impossible to teach self-love in one minute. This process can take months or even years. Just understand that self-love is your path, your daily practice, but not the final destination. Self-love is made up of simple things you do every day. Only by learning to love yourself can you learn to truly love others. Not only family or friends, but also every living creature that you meet on your way!

Namaste!


Katya Ki is the Founder of SOLANCHA Magazine, a Metaphysical Expert, a Reiki Master, and Human Rights Attorney. She has been studying Eastern metaphysics, cosmology, and esotericism for almost 20 years now. And she's still discovering new knowledge, which is hidden in ancient teachings. During her pilgrimage to the monastery of Saint Catherine in Egypt, she discovered the SOLANCHA System. This is how the SOLANCHA journey started!

Parenting

Gratitude Journal for Kids: The What, Why, and How to Guide

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Sometimes we are so worried about what our kids will become that we forget we have the power to mold them in our hands. Like we can sit back and let our children whine and complain about all the things they think they deserve or teach them to accept life as it is and work towards a better tomorrow. Today I will share with you how to harness the power of gratitude in their young minds irrespective of which age your kid is as long as they can speak and understand. A gratitude journal for kids will achieve just that and more.

What is Gratitude?

Gratus is the Latin word from where gratitude is borrowed. It means showing appreciation. Most religions and traditional spiritualists over the years have taught gratitude to multiple generations. And, in recent times, psychologists have also joined the bandwagon; preaching the importance of gratitude. What are you grateful for?

Do you know that you can impart the same practice to your young ones using a gratitude journal for kids?

You read that right.

So Why Gratitude Journaling?

Gratitude Journaling For Kids Benefits Image

Your child will enjoy the following benefits once you start practicing gratitude:

#1: Better relationships

Acknowledging help or support from friends can open up new opportunities. This is especially important for introverted kids or kids who are naturally aggressive. Once they start gratitude journaling, they open up to saying “thank you” even for small favors from their peers. In turn, they win more friends. Now, who doesn’t want their kid to be popular for all the good reasons? 

#2: Improved psychological health

In addition to winning more friends over, a gratitude journal for kids can help them reduce toxic emotions. These include frustrations that result in resentment, envy (because they think their peers are more blessed than they are) and regret among others.

You see, when they learn to count their blessings, they will focus on them more than focusing on what they don’t have. So, each time your son says, “mommy Tony has a digital bike”, open the gratitude journal on the day they were grateful for their old-school bike as a reminder.

#3: Better Performance in school

Research has proven that gratitude increases mental strength. In addition, when your kid has little to worry about, they sleep better. And good sleeping patterns have also been linked to higher IQs. So, it’s a win-win for you.

#4: More empathy and reduced aggression

There is this category of kids who are sadly referred to as “bullies”. A gratitude journal for kids will tone the aggression down by introducing them to empathy. Consequently, they behave in a prosocial manner even when those around them behave less kind. See such environments make them hostile but with gratitude journaling, they will look at the positive side instead of seeking revenge. And don’t we all want that for our kids?

So now that we agree, let me share with you how to start journaling with your children.

6 Ways to Introduce Gratitude Journaling for Kids

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#1: Set the Example

Kids at ages 2-6 learn by watching adults. They tend to copy paste what mommy or daddy does. So before you go bonkers with a list of gratitude journaling instructions, show them your gratitude journal first. Other than setting an example, your gratitude journal will also teach you and impact the same benefits you wish to instill in your kids. Because, let’s be honest, you can’t convince your little one that a gratitude journal for kids will have a positive impact unless you experience it first, right?

#2: Invest In an Age Appropriate Gratitude Journal

You will find several gratitude journals; some free and others available online for easy download. The online options also come with customizable templates so you can design a journal that your kids can relate to. Just make it simple to follow and interesting to work with. While at it, include a few prompts.

Like:

“What made you happy today?

“What do you wish for tomorrow?”

Etc.

Such prompts make it easier for children to follow along on their own. 

#3: Drawings and Pictures

Ideas For Kids Journaling Image

Kids under 8 years are visual and creative with colors. If you have a camera, let them take photos randomly. However, there’s a catch: only when they are happy. At the end of the day, review these photos, print them and stick them in their journal with a sentence or two to remind them of these occasions.

The idea is to create a gratitude journal for kids that they can grow with. So three years from now, they will look at these photos in their lowest moments and smile.

In the absence of a camera, you can encourage them to draw pictures of what made them happy during the day. Was it their pet or a walk in the park? Then let them draw their pet or the park and add a description of the exact event? A few colors will bring these drawings to life.

#4: Creative Affirmations

Above 5 years of age, you can teach your child to manifest their life. Start with the basic things they understand. And when these affirmations come to pass, journal them together. See the mind is as powerful as our creativity. Teach your kids the law of attraction as early as now. 

#5: Sing Along Songs

Gratitude song image

YouTube is full of gratitude songs for kids. However, you don’t have to stop there. Create your own lyrics and sing along each day before you go to bed. The good thing about songs is they are easily replayed in the subconscious mind even in sleep. And the secret to effective gratitude journaling is repetition. See what I’m doing?

#6: Poetry and Short Stories

For kids above the age of 8 years, engage them in lengthy scripts. By this age, they are already writing academic compositions anyway, so why not channel that creativity in their gratitude journals?

In Conclusion

A gratitude journal for kids sets a strong foundation for a positive mindset. See we all need positivity to make it through each day. However, with gratitude, you’re not merely surviving the day but enjoying and looking forward to each moment in your life. Let your child experience the same from a tender age and they will effortlessly transit to adulthood as happy and responsible people.


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Relationships

Sexual Harmony: Living In Peace With Yourself And Your Partner

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Quarantine made married and engaged couples face big challenges in the relationship. 40% of couples surveyed reported spending more than 20 extra hours per week with their partners as a result of social distancing. However, only 18% of surveyed couples reported satisfaction in communication with their partner, with the largest source of conflict reported was how often to have sex. In this article, we want to introduce you to sexual harmony and how to achieve it based on Ayurvedic principles.

If you happen to struggle in your relationship during this global pandemic, sexual harmony principles can not only help you to balance and improve your relationship, but more importantly, can help you to be in harmony with yourself and your true nature!

Ayurveda And Sexual Harmony

To achieve wellness, the principles of Ayurveda work to equate the three elemental doshas (also known as mind-body types) of Pitta, Vata, and Kapha within the body. 

According to Ayurveda, proper nutrition, healthy sleep, and harmonious sexual relationship are the basis of human health.

If we look at the Ayurvedic texts, we will see how important sex life was and how seriously it was taken. In ancient treatises, you can find detailed recommendations on how to establish an intimate life, how much sex we really need, and how to have sex properly. This all leads to sexual harmony.

All the recommendations below are based on the experience of many generations who lived in harmony with nature and natural biological rhythms.

How Much Sex Do We Need?

sexual harmony principles image

Advice on regulating sexual life can be found in the treatise “Ashtanga Hridayam”, which was written by Vagbhata more than 2,5 thousand years ago. According to this sacred text:

  • during the winter season, a person can have sex every day, as long as he/she can;
  • during the spring and fall season, a person can have sex once every three days;
  • during the summertime, a person can have sex once a fortnight.

Why is it recommended to limit sex in the summer? You see, during the summer heat, Pitta dosha can get out of control, and frequent intercourse can worsen this imbalance. Spring and autumn are considered a moderate period. Therefore, sex every three days will not exhaust the body and will not bring the dosha out of balance.

Sexual Harmony Based On Your Dosha

Not only in nutrition but also in intimate matters, you need to take into account the individual constitution – dosha. After all, dosha reacts differently to a relationship with a partner.

If you don’t know your dosha, please take our Ayurvedic Body Type Quiz!

ayurveda body types image

Pitta Dosha

The people of the Pitta dosha are strong, energetic, and passionate. They like frequent sex, which can bring the fire element out of balance. Therefore, Pitta dosha is better to observe moderation, especially during the summer season.

Vata Dosha

The people of the Vata dosha are lean, lively, and creative. They may have trouble sleeping and may be overly sensitive. Vata dosha people should take care of the preservation of Ojas and restrict sexual contact until full energy recovery.

Kapha Dosha

The people of Kapha dosha tend to be overweight, emotionally calm, and stable. This dosha type has a strong body and therefore, these people can have sex more often without draining the Ojas.

How To Get Energy?

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Aphrodisiacs are often mentioned in the sacred texts about sexual relationships. Why are they needed? The fact is that sex drains Ojas — the life force that gives energy and is responsible for the immune system. Strong Ojas not only supports the body’s tissues in a healthy state, but it is also responsible for a stable mind, clear consciousness, and stress resistance.

For a strong libido and recovery of Ojas, you need to eat well. Did you know that usually people burn up to 300 calories during sex? Therefore, a light salad or smoothie will not make up for the energy spent. Make sure you eat nutritious meals that contain coconut or olive oil.

Ayurvedic Remedies to Support Libido

Ashwagandha

The Kama Sutra mentions ashwagandha in its literature as a potent sexual stimulant. Ayurvedic doctors recommend ashwagandha to men. Its use increases the level of testosterone by 40%, as well as improves mobility and sperm count, which has a positive effect on the treatment of male infertility.

For men, ashwagandha stimulates the production of nitric oxide in the body. This causes a dilatation of the blood vessels that carry blood to the genitals, leading to increased sexual desire.

For women, taking ashwagandha typically produces an increase in sexual desire and satisfaction.

Safed Musli

Safed Musli image

This ayurvedic remedy is effective for erectile dysfunction, low libido in both men and women. Safed Musli increases stamina in general and during sex in particular.

It increases the production of testosterone, improves the sperm count and enhances sexual desire.

The benefits of healthy intimacy go beyond sexual satisfaction. Partners who enjoy healthy sexual life also experience its beneficial effects in other areas of their romantic life. Better intimacy leads to better communication and togetherness – which is the secret to any conscious relationship.

Shatavari

This is the best ayurvedic herb for the female reproductive system: it rejuvenates and normalizes the hormones. As an aphrodisiac, it removes frigidity and restores sexual desire.

Shatavari has a toning and calming effect on the woman’s body which helps restore her libido. Also, it enhances the reproductive system.

Chyawanprash

It is a nourishing jam that blends Ayurvedic herbs into a base of amla, a fruit known to be a natural source of antioxidants.

Chyawanprash was originally formulated to strengthen and revitalize the reproductive organs. It plays a very important role in triggering the reproductive system and promotes vitality and sexual health. In addition, chyawanprash promotes fertility, healthy libido, sexual stamina in both men and women.

Coconut oil

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Give each other a tantric massage with coconut oil. Its cooling effect protects against overheating during sex. In addition, it will make your skin soft and pleasant to the touch!

The Bottom Line

Sex begins outside of the bed and even the bedroom. A full sexual life is based on trust and conscious communication. Be attentive to each other, show care, and understanding. This way you will create a comfortable space for each other and be able to openly express your feelings, talk about what turns you on, what you want to recieve from your partner. Openness and trust will fill your sex life with joy and pleasurable experiments. And by following all the above Ayurvedic tips you will increase your passion and create a sexual harmony in your relationship!


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Love

Peach Blossom Luck Formula: Feng Shui Method For Attracting Love

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Peach Blossom Formula is the most easy-to-use Feng Shui method for activating love luck. However, this formula should be used only if you want to attract a serious and meaningful relationship in your life. This method is not suitable for those who are looking for frivolous fun. Peach Blossom formula is designed to attract a soulmate or a marriage partner, activate your marriage luck and bring true love into your life. Therefore before using it ask yourself if you are ready for a serious relationship!

What Is Peach Blossom In Feng Shui?

Peach blossom is a culturally determined association of a lover’s face with the beauty of peach blossoms in Chinese folklore.

The formula contains a Chinese zodiac sign (animal) that helps in attracting love, your personal Chinese zodiac sign and its location in the house.

Although the Peach blossom luck formula is mostly used when looking for a serious love relationship, it can also be used to attract like-minded friends, too.

The Peach blossom luck formula is based on the calculations of the Feng Shui school, which uses the so-called “four pillars of fate”. It determines your personality type and the most appropriate type of luck in love.

This method focuses on the four animal signs that occupy the four cardinal directions of the compass. Each of these four Animals has the power to bring Peach blossom marriage luck to a specific group of people born under certain Animal signs.

Despite its name, the Peach blossom luck formula does not imply the use of peach flowers as a Feng Shui symbol. You don’t have to cover the bedroom walls with peach wallpaper or use peach color decor.

How To Use the Peach Blossom Luck Formula?

First, you need to identify your Chinese zodiac sign. To do this, you just need to find your date of birth in the Hundred Year Calendar (click here)!

Now that you know your Chinese zodiac sign you can find your Peach blossom animal sign in the chart below and display you peach blossom animal in the corresponding Bagua sector (direction). This is where you have to use your creativity and go for a representation of the animal energy that you like. It can be a painting, a picture, a statue of your Peach Blossom animal. You can even draw it yourself. The main rule is – you should like it and it should really speak to your heart.

Peach Blossom Luck Chart Image

Peach Blossom Luck For the Rat, Monkey, and Dragon

If you were born in the years of Rat, Monkey, or Dragon, the animal Chi that will unlock your Peach blossom luck is the Rooster placed in the West sector of your house or West corner of your bedroom. The size of the image or statue doesn’t matter, as long as the Rooster is beautifully made. It is preferable if the Rooster is adorned with jewels.

Chinese Zodiac Animal Rooster Image

Peach Blossom Luck For the Rabbit, Boar, and Sheep

If you were born in the years of Rabbit, Boar, or Monkey, the animal Chi that will unlock your Peach blossom luck is the Rat placed in the North sector of your house or North corner of your bedroom. Look for the Rat figurine that is well made. Alternatively, you can use a figurine of a mongoose spewing jewels.

Peach Blossom Animal Rat Image

Peach Blossom Luck For the Snake, Rooster, and Ox

If you were born in the years of Snake, Rooster, or Ox, the animal Chi that will unlock your Peach blossom luck is the Horse placed in the South sector of your house or South corner of your bedroom. Make sure the Horse figurine/image has jewels and is well made. The more beautiful your Horse figurine/image is, the better it will be able to manifest your match.

Peach Blossom Animal Horse Image

Peach Blossom Luck For the Tiger, Horse, and Dog

If you were born in the years of Tiger, Horse, or Dog, the animal Chi that will unlock your Peach blossom luck is the Rabbit placed in the East sector of your house or East corner of your bedroom. If possible, get the Rabbit figurine that is bedecked with jewels.

Peach Blossom Animal Rabbit Image

What Happens When You Activate Your Peach Blossom Luck?

Activating your Peach blossom luck will create the situation for you to meet someone with serious intentions. However, it doesn’t guarantee the longevity or quality of the marriage. These aspects depend on your own karma.

Feng Shui creates the Chi that is conducive to life being happy and joyful. But it is not magic and cannot be used for changing someone’s destiny or karma. Feng Shui accounts for only 1/3 of your luck. The other 2/3 are down to your karma and the choices you make.

If you are currently dating someone but he/she is afraid of making a commitment, you need to understand that the Peach blossom luck will not make him/her want to marry you. You should know that it can even trigger a break up in the relationship if there is no destiny affinity between you and your partner. Thus, by breaking the relationship that is not going anywhere, it could be clearing the way for you to meet your true soulmate.

The Bottom Line

After you activate your peach blossom luck, you have to be patient. When you almost forget about it (usually, it takes about 3 months or a little longer), your soulmate will appear in your life.

As simple as it sounds, there are many people that have successfully used the Peach blossom luck formula, so you can give it a try and enjoy its wonderful results!


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