Relationships

How To Master Conscious Communication? 8 Effective Tips

Published

1 year ago

October 28, 2019

In everyday communication, it is not so important how smart, wise or spiritual we are as much as what frequency the communication takes place on. The frequency of communication is influenced by many factors such as the emotions and feelings we express, the words we choose, how we build phrases, our intentions, our energy, mood, and more. In this article, I will share with you what conscious communication is and effective tips you can use to master it!

What Is Conscious Communication?

Conscious communication is a way of talking and listening that is focused on growing strong, mutually enriching relationships.

A key principle of conscious communication is to make it as easy as possible for the other person to satisfy your needs by asking for a specific behavior that will fulfill it.

When people feel vulnerable, they usually often try to compensate for it by becoming demanding and threatening. They are convinced that forcefulness will increase the likelihood of getting what they want. However, this approach usually has the opposite effect, leading to conflict situations and misunderstandings. Some people feel unaccepted. Others feel pressure and violation of personal boundaries. As a rule, such things lead to ruining relationships.

The Secret Of Conscious Communication

So what is the secret of conscious communication?

According to Yogi Bhajan, we need to strive for pure, intuitive communication, without hidden meaning and desire to benefit from dialogue, without trying to convict the interlocutor of falsehood or being wrong. We also need to elevate people around us, to give them a chance to see and be aware of themselves from the outside on their own.

“When you speak unconsciously, you represent your emotions, your feelings, your neuroses, your handicaps, your shortcomings, and your insecurities. When you speak subconsciously, you are a con-person, you are a thief, you are a cheat, you manipulate, you are dishonest. All you want is to win the moment or impress the moment. Such people are never true to a bigger picture; they are never real in their lives. When you speak consciously, that which you speak about happens. When you speak super-consciously from the supreme self of you, that becomes the guiding line for the Universe. Then the akashic record has to move with that angle.” – Yogi Bhajan

8 Tips On Conscious Communication

Tip #1: Practice Self-Observation

Conscious dialogue, first of all, involves observing yourself during the communication process. It includes the understanding of what emotions and feelings are hidden behind each spoken phrase. Moreover, we need to be aware of what exactly motivates us to be involved in this dialogue and what we want to achieve as a result.

All these factors affect our voice tone, facial expressions, and gestures. Therefore, it is very important to monitor the reaction of the body, to feel the emotions that guide us in the process of dialogue.

Tip #2: Keep Emotional Neutrality And Inner Silence

Neutrality does not mean that we need to get rid of feelings, but it means that all our emotional manifestations are under observation. It is like control, not in the sense of “I restrain myself,” but in the sense of “I observe myself from the outside.”

You might notice how radically your speech changes if you conduct a dialogue from the point of irritation and fear. I’m sure you know that feeling of how it is difficult to agree when there are a hidden resistance and unwillingness to compromise.

Therefore, internal neutrality allows not only to say the necessary words but also to monitor everything you say, every influence on the change of the mood of the dialogue.

Tip #3: Be Aware Of What Chakra The Dialogue Is Coming From

Every conversation we have is connected to a certain chakra. This energetical connection is very important since it affects the energy of the whole conversation and your interlocutor can sense it.

If we speak from the first energy center (Muladhara chakra), our speech can be unnecessarily cautious. However, in a state of anger, our speech can be rough.

When we speak from the second energy center (Svadhisthana chakra), our speech is soft, sometimes – sexual.

If we speak from the third energy center (Manipura chakra), the conversation acquires persistence, the effect of pressure.

When we speak from the fourth energy center (Anahata chakra), we present ourselves from the heart. In this case, our words are colored by emotions. Sometimes it prevents us from seeing the objective truth.

If we speak from the fifth energy center (Vishuddha chakra), we sound like diplomats with a structured analytical mindset.

When we speak from the sixth energy center (Ajna chakra), our speech turns into an endless stream. If communication is based on your Third eye chakra it usually brings more truth into conversation. This type of communication is based on intuition and empathy.

Tip #4: Surrender To The Circumstances

The main rule of tantric practices is: to win by surrendering to the situation, circumstances.

Use this rule in communication if there is a dispute. This will help to find the right words, build a dialogue. Release all emotions inside yourself, surrender to circumstances and watch the result.

Meditation is an important assistant in communication. Here we not only calm our emotions, reach a state of neutrality, but also learn to be aware of our space, boundaries, observe our reactions in the process of dialogue.

In this state of balance, communication becomes constructive, and there is a stable ability to timely select the right words and competently build the entire dialogue.

Tip #5: Take Responsibility For Your Feelings

When describing your feelings, choose words that express the sensations you’re experiencing, such as: “I feel sad”, or “I feel frustrated”, or “I feel lonely”, etc. Avoid words that describe you as a victim, such as: “I feel betrayed”, or “I feel rejected”, or “I feel neglected”, etc. These “victimizing” words suggest that someone else is responsible for your feelings. When you take responsibility for your feelings and emotions, you are informing rather than blaming the people.

Tip #6: Keep The Message Positive

Under no circumstances are you required to speak negatively. Make sure that your speech doesn’t sound offensive. Neither should you speak in a way that would be just buttering. Speaking should be neither overdoing nor under-doing nor super-positive nor super-negative.

Keep in mind that communication is just vibration. Therefore, pay attention to what frequency you are vibrating. Keep producing positive vibrations and don’t allow a conversation to turn to in a negative way. A conscious person talks with absolute dignity and faith.

Tip #7: Ask For What You Want

What specific behaviors or actions would fulfill your needs? For instance, if you want more attention from your partner, do not just ask him/her to spend more time with you. Instead, ask him/her to take you for a walk after dinner, or go to a movie on Saturday night. Express your need in the form of a request rather than a demand. Everyone has an inherent impulse to resist demands, whereas our self-esteem goes up when we’re able to fulfill requests.

Although using this process doesn’t guarantee that you’ll always get what you need, it will substantially increase the likelihood that you will spend more time feeling comfortable and at ease and less time in emotional distress.

Tip #8: Be Conscious Of Timing

Timing can make a big difference. Sometimes it can be just as important as how and what you say. For example, it is usually not a good idea to bring up sensitive topics right before a meal when blood sugar is low. It is also not a good idea to bring up issues in the heat of the moment when you or the interlocutor is angry and hurt. It would be a good idea to find a good time for both. This conveys mutual respect and sets the stage for a productive discussion.

Conclusion

Conscious communication is an inner driven focus to grow strong and mutually enriching relationships. Remember that conscious communication includes not just conscious speaking but conscious listening. Like giving and receiving, the effects of how you talk are inseparable from how you listen.

Up Next

Sexual Narcissist: The 7 Signs You are Dealing with One

Don't Miss

The Spiritual Connection Checklist: 11 Signs You Are Spiritually Connected With Someone

Katya Ki

Katya Ki is the Founder of SOLANCHA Magazine, a Metaphysical Expert, a Reiki Master, and Human Rights Attorney. She has been studying Eastern metaphysics, cosmology, and esotericism for almost 20 years now. And she's still discovering new knowledge, which is hidden in ancient teachings. During her pilgrimage to the monastery of Saint Catherine in Egypt, she discovered the SOLANCHA System. This is how the SOLANCHA journey started!

Relationships

Soul Friend: 8 Signs You Found One

Published

2 weeks ago

February 18, 2021

SOLANCHA STAFF

Who is on your friends’ list? Can you refer to any of them as your soul friend? See, today’s global village way of life makes us refer to strangers as our friends for the sake of associating with them on social media. You know, some even call each other frenemies. Yet, true friends, let alone soul friends share an interpersonal bond that grows over time. They are honest, loyal, available, and understanding. More so, they are the people who will check on you, ensuring you are not lonely or living in isolation.

So, who is your soul friend?

The Definition

A soul friend can be a friend, lover, sibling, spouse, or anyone else that you share with feelings of deep affinity. Think of it as having one soul in two separate bodies. Hence, the friendship cuts across all aspects of your lives and is never based on monetary or sexual gain. Indeed, it is a platonic tie, way beyond a sexual relationship or loyal friendship.

Importance of Soul Friendships

When you discover your soul mate friend, you keep each other lively and vital regardless of your circumstances. This friend becomes your spiritual sidekick, nourishing your soul with love and encouragement always. A true soul friend is with you through your darkest nights and brightest days.

Recognizing your soul friend early will benefit you in many ways:

You get an affirmation of how strong and resilient you are, boosting your self-confidence
Now, you can let go of any limiting beliefs you have due to childhood traumas to live a more fulfilling adult life
A soul friend helps you discover your purpose in life and supports your life journey unconditionally
Soul friends make a conscious effort to pursue soul growth, attaining a state of peace for a better life

Signs You Found Your Soul Friend

Then, how do you know that you have met your soul friend? Here are 8 distinct ways to do so.

#1: You Count On Each Other

Soul friends count on each other for protection, moral support, and getting an energy boost whenever they feel low. More so, a soul friend will: –

Be brutally honest with you
Stick around even after a heated argument
Offer immediate help to help you prepare for your career breakthrough meeting
Take you in and offer you a shoulder to cry on when your home or family is falling apart
Be your wingman or woman as you explore new territories
Know what to do when you are having a bad day
Be your partner in crime when you need to get your hands dirty on some backlog
Never judge your bad decisions, but lets you know if you made a mistake

#2: Forgiveness Comes Naturally

How many times do you have to forgive your friend? Or, are you the type who says, “I thought you were my friend”? Soul friends share lots of memories; ups and downs that they learn to tolerate each other’s flaws. Likewise, a soul friend will not take advantage of the other’s kindness to hurt them. Instead, they overlook offenses for the sake of their friendship.

#3: Mutual Trust

Your soul friend is the type of person you can trust with your life, literally. Hence, soul friends will:

Set and respect their boundaries
Keep their word
Maintain integrity in all their interactions
Adopt a straightforward and consistent behavior towards each other
Keep confidential things between themselves

Mutual trust allows soul friends to share intimate details about their past knowing the other person is a reliable confidant.

#4: Soul Friends Practice Effective Communication

When soul friends converse, they are in tune with one another. Hence, one of them may not agree with what the other is saying but will listen actively all the same. In contrast, most frenemies tolerate the friendship for as long as it suits them. Hence, they are guilty of selective listening. Hence, most soul friendships are free of drama, frustrating compromise, or misunderstandings.

#5: No Topic is Too Taboo

Soul friends talk about anything and everything. It is a two-way sharing of ideas, ensuring both friends benefit. Hence, think of a person you term as your soul friend. Then, think of an issue that is too uncomfortable for you. It can be your childhood scars, stereotypes that you do not agree with, or opinions on politics, same-sex marriages, or spirituality. Can you raise and discuss it with this friend? A soul friend will respect your opinions and not judge you afterward.

#6: Find the Best in You

We all have aspects about our bodies, careers, or lifestyle that we feel inadequate about. It could range from those who feel not beautiful, handsome, intelligent, or rich enough to those who fear losing control when under pressure. Yet, soul friends have a flipped perspective on this. They choose to see and remind each other of their best traits. For example, when recovering from substance abuse, a soul friend will remind you how you battled and won depression, ensuring you put up a spirited fight. This conscious relationship helps soul friends to care for one another when the other is feeling low.

#7: All Criticism is Constructive

Soul friends weigh their words when they want to criticize each other. That is, they consider the other person’s emotional wellbeing, and are out to find solutions, not just identify a problem. In contrast, negative criticism leaves one of the friends feeling superior to the other.

#8: Life is Unimaginable without Your Soul Friend

Finally, before we discover our soul friends, life seems quite normal. Then, the soul friend comes along; all of a sudden you cannot imagine a life without them. Most soul friends have never thought of a time when they will have to part ways. Indeed, soul friendship makes the soul buddies feel incredibly full.

Conclusion

Despite the devalued way that today’s generations refer to friendships, soul friends do exist. When you find one, cherish him or her. Use the above signs to pinpoint them from your group of purported friends. That way, you have a life companion.

Dating

How to Attract Love in 2021: Life-Changing Feng Shui Tips

Published

2 months ago

January 15, 2021

Katya Ki

If you’re truly serious about looking for a soulmate and want to settle down, get married and start a family, you can rejoice as 2021 may finally be your year for finding love! In this article, I will share with you life-changing Feng Shui tips on how to attract love in 2021! Also, if you’re already in a relationship, I will give you a few tips on how to protect your marriage and balance your relationship in 2021.

Feng Shui Tips On How To Attract Love In 2021

Tip #1: Enhance the East Sector

For singles, it looks to be a good year for romance as the Peach Blossom Star has flown to the East sector. East is the sector of the Rabbit who is associated with the energy of the Moon and the Moon Goddess who rules love and romantic relationships and everything related to romance.

The legend tells that if you catch the attention of the Moon Goddess, she will assist in all matters of the heart, improve relationships between those in love, and help those still looking for love.

Since Romance Star is residing in the East this year, you need to enhance the East sector, the Moon Rabbit’s home, in order to manifest love and romance. To do so display the Rabbit in the Moon in the East corner of your living space. Placing this powerful Feng Shui activator in the East will help those of you who are single to meet someone special. Also, it helps those of you who are already married to keep your relationship strong.

Tip #2: Attract Love In 2021 By Displaying Your Peach Blossom Animal

If you want to speed things up in the area of marriage, display your Peach Blossom Animal in the appropriate location designated for your animal sign. If you don’t know your Peach Blossom Animal, use this simple Peach blossom formula to find out.

Tip #3: Protect Your Relationship From The External Flower of Romance Star

However, all is not rosy in the area of love. Romance blossoms but does not last in 2021. Marriages and serious relationships become vulnerable in 2021. Unhappiness leads to affairs.

If you are already married, be aware of the External Flower of Romance Star in the chart which unfortunately makes all marriages vulnerable due to outside temptation. This is the year when “innocent friendships” at work may develop into something more serious and destroy a marriage.

The External Flower of the Romance Star brings betrayals and infidelity in marriages, with many outside temptations affecting those born in the years of the Rat, Rabbit, and Sheep.

To protect your marriage from third parties, display the Rabbit in the Moon in the East corner of your living space.

Also, carry the Enhancing Relationships Amulet. This amulet is a powerful protection against third party troublemakers. It prevents infidelities and improves relationships between the spouses.

Display the Marriage Happiness Ducks in the Southwest and East. This beautiful Feng Shui activator brings not just marital happiness. It lights up your life and helps you see all the beauty and good qualities in each other. These beautiful ducks also subdue inharmonious energies that cause quarrels and arguments. This is the essential symbol for the home of any married couple, as it ensures you stay happily married for a long time. It strengthens your love for one another and brings plenty of joy and good times to the marriage.

If you suspect that your spouse is already involved with someone, you can call on Kurukulle a powerful Goddess of love by chanting the Kurukulle mantra:

“OM KURUKULLE HRIH SOHA”

Chant it 21 times daily.

The Bottom Line

Remember that if you’re looking for love and romance that can lead to marriage, the Peach Blossom Formula is an extremely fast-acting method. Place your Peach Blossom Animal in the appropriate sector to attract your soulmate. This is also an effective way if you have been dating a long time, for you to get your partner to finally propose!

This is a good year for love! Make the most of it!

Relationships

Sexual Harmony: Living In Peace With Yourself And Your Partner

Published

8 months ago

July 20, 2020

SOLANCHA STAFF

Quarantine made married and engaged couples face big challenges in the relationship. 40% of couples surveyed reported spending more than 20 extra hours per week with their partners as a result of social distancing. However, only 18% of surveyed couples reported satisfaction in communication with their partner, with the largest source of conflict reported was how often to have sex. In this article, we want to introduce you to sexual harmony and how to achieve it based on Ayurvedic principles.

If you happen to struggle in your relationship during this global pandemic, sexual harmony principles can not only help you to balance and improve your relationship, but more importantly, can help you to be in harmony with yourself and your true nature!

Ayurveda And Sexual Harmony

To achieve wellness, the principles of Ayurveda work to equate the three elemental doshas (also known as mind-body types) of Pitta, Vata, and Kapha within the body.

According to Ayurveda, proper nutrition, healthy sleep, and harmonious sexual relationship are the basis of human health.

If we look at the Ayurvedic texts, we will see how important sex life was and how seriously it was taken. In ancient treatises, you can find detailed recommendations on how to establish an intimate life, how much sex we really need, and how to have sex properly. This all leads to sexual harmony.

All the recommendations below are based on the experience of many generations who lived in harmony with nature and natural biological rhythms.

How Much Sex Do We Need?

Advice on regulating sexual life can be found in the treatise “Ashtanga Hridayam”, which was written by Vagbhata more than 2,5 thousand years ago. According to this sacred text:

during the winter season, a person can have sex every day, as long as he/she can;
during the spring and fall season, a person can have sex once every three days;
during the summertime, a person can have sex once a fortnight.

Why is it recommended to limit sex in the summer? You see, during the summer heat, Pitta dosha can get out of control, and frequent intercourse can worsen this imbalance. Spring and autumn are considered a moderate period. Therefore, sex every three days will not exhaust the body and will not bring the dosha out of balance.

Sexual Harmony Based On Your Dosha

Not only in nutrition but also in intimate matters, you need to take into account the individual constitution – dosha. After all, dosha reacts differently to a relationship with a partner.

If you don’t know your dosha, please take our Ayurvedic Body Type Quiz!

Pitta Dosha

The people of the Pitta dosha are strong, energetic, and passionate. They like frequent sex, which can bring the fire element out of balance. Therefore, Pitta dosha is better to observe moderation, especially during the summer season.

Vata Dosha

The people of the Vata dosha are lean, lively, and creative. They may have trouble sleeping and may be overly sensitive. Vata dosha people should take care of the preservation of Ojas and restrict sexual contact until full energy recovery.

Kapha Dosha

The people of Kapha dosha tend to be overweight, emotionally calm, and stable. This dosha type has a strong body and therefore, these people can have sex more often without draining the Ojas.

How To Get Energy?

Aphrodisiacs are often mentioned in the sacred texts about sexual relationships. Why are they needed? The fact is that sex drains Ojas — the life force that gives energy and is responsible for the immune system. Strong Ojas not only supports the body’s tissues in a healthy state, but it is also responsible for a stable mind, clear consciousness, and stress resistance.

For a strong libido and recovery of Ojas, you need to eat well. Did you know that usually people burn up to 300 calories during sex? Therefore, a light salad or smoothie will not make up for the energy spent. Make sure you eat nutritious meals that contain coconut or olive oil.

Ayurvedic Remedies to Support Libido

Ashwagandha

The Kama Sutra mentions ashwagandha in its literature as a potent sexual stimulant. Ayurvedic doctors recommend ashwagandha to men. Its use increases the level of testosterone by 40%, as well as improves mobility and sperm count, which has a positive effect on the treatment of male infertility.

For men, ashwagandha stimulates the production of nitric oxide in the body. This causes a dilatation of the blood vessels that carry blood to the genitals, leading to increased sexual desire.

For women, taking ashwagandha typically produces an increase in sexual desire and satisfaction.

Safed Musli

This ayurvedic remedy is effective for erectile dysfunction, low libido in both men and women. Safed Musli increases stamina in general and during sex in particular.

It increases the production of testosterone, improves the sperm count and enhances sexual desire.

The benefits of healthy intimacy go beyond sexual satisfaction. Partners who enjoy healthy sexual life also experience its beneficial effects in other areas of their romantic life. Better intimacy leads to better communication and togetherness – which is the secret to any conscious relationship.

Shatavari

This is the best ayurvedic herb for the female reproductive system: it rejuvenates and normalizes the hormones. As an aphrodisiac, it removes frigidity and restores sexual desire.

Shatavari has a toning and calming effect on the woman’s body which helps restore her libido. Also, it enhances the reproductive system.

Chyawanprash

It is a nourishing jam that blends Ayurvedic herbs into a base of amla, a fruit known to be a natural source of antioxidants.

Chyawanprash was originally formulated to strengthen and revitalize the reproductive organs. It plays a very important role in triggering the reproductive system and promotes vitality and sexual health. In addition, chyawanprash promotes fertility, healthy libido, sexual stamina in both men and women.

Coconut oil

Give each other a tantric massage with coconut oil. Its cooling effect protects against overheating during sex. In addition, it will make your skin soft and pleasant to the touch!

The Bottom Line

Sex begins outside of the bed and even the bedroom. A full sexual life is based on trust and conscious communication. Be attentive to each other, show care, and understanding. This way you will create a comfortable space for each other and be able to openly express your feelings, talk about what turns you on, what you want to recieve from your partner. Openness and trust will fill your sex life with joy and pleasurable experiments. And by following all the above Ayurvedic tips you will increase your passion and create a sexual harmony in your relationship!