Do you know someone with a high sense of his abilities, in total disregard of everyone else? You could be dealing with a narcissist. And, it gets a bit twisted with a sexual narcissist. These types manipulate those around them for their sexual pleasure. They want to have as many partners as possible to portray a sexual prowess that they believe they possess. Yet, such a person never gets intimate with anyone.
Who is a Sexual Narcissist?
A sexual narcissist is a master seducer. His personality disorder means that he seeks sexual pleasure from others with no plans of reciprocating. That is, his sexual needs come first. Since they feel superior over their partners, they will want to control their spouses, yet remain noncommittal.
So, what happens if you are in a sexual relationship with such a person? It is almost certain that you will get hurt in the process.
How to Identify a Sexual Narcissist?
What are the telltale signs that you are dating a sexual narcissist? Can you protect yourself from such a toxic relationship?
1. A Natural Charmer
Sexual narcissists know what to say or do to appear romantic to their partners. Picture this: Does his allure win you over the first few encounters? Does his charisma make you feel appreciated and special? Or, do you find yourself having a weak spot for his seductive ways? All those dinners, gifts, and special attention he gives you are intentional. He wants to prove himself that he can conquer whoever he wants with his sex appeal. However, such a stance never lasts.
2. No Intimacy in The Relationship
For example, does your partner focus more on perfecting his lovemaking techniques? Does it seem like he cares less whether you have an intimate connection in the first place? Plus, do you often feel like you are his object of sexual pleasure?
Such partners insist on you maintaining a specific sexy look. Alternatively, they want you to take a crash diet to look a certain way, not caring how you feel about the change.
Intimacy requires partners to empathize with one another. In turn, you must show that you care about the other person’s feelings. However, a sexual narcissist will struggle with showing such intimacy.
3. Available For Sex Only
A sexual narcissist will put a lot of pressure on the partner so that they can meet for sex. But, he quickly leaves and never checks on the partner afterward. It’s the kind of person that leaves their spouses feeling empty and used.
This neglect after sex only shows that they are in the relationship for sexual pleasure and not love. The only other time he will show interest in the sexual partner is when he looks forward to another sexual encounter.
4. Cheating with Multiple Partners
Since a sexual narcissist is never intimate with anyone, he tends to have many sexual partners at the same time. It is a sexual addiction that can only be satisfied by seeking enjoyment from more people. Even in a marriage, such a person will be cheating on the spouse continuously. To cover his behavior, sexual narcissists have a violent relationship with their spouses.
In contrast, when single, they will never commit to the relationship. Instead, he will hop from one partner to another, trying to quench his thirst for sexual gratification.
5. They Belittle Their Partners
Does your partner insult you for no reason? Don’t be quick to blame yourself. For a sexual narcissist, nothing good can come out of their partners. They always find fault in the way their partners carry themselves. Often, they will point out flaws to their partners to put them down in public. It is their cruel way to appear superior and relevant.
Indeed, in the eyes of the sexual narcissists, their partners are little to them. So, before you start doubting and blaming yourself for things you did not do, first confirm if your partner is a sexual narcissist or not.
6. They Will Not Handle Criticism Well
Have you ever tried to point out a mistake to a sexual narcissist? He will throw a tantrum, give you the silent treatment, or shift the blame on you. More so, he behaves like a bully or an angry child to avoid facing the consequences of his actions. In fact, they often make ridicule out of the situation.
Where possible, he will try to attack the other person at a personal level to belittle them. When this does not work, he will resort to the cold shoulder. You know, denying the other love and affection in any given relationship. This cold treatment will continue until the day the partner gives in.
Often, sexual narcissist also plays a victim. He can accuse the other person of being ungrateful for his contribution so far.
7. It Is A One-Sided Relationship
How much can you meet his sexual demands? A typical sexual relationship with a sexual narcissist revolves around his narcissistic needs. For example, he will dictate what to wear when going out, how long you can stay out, and with who. He wants to control your thoughts into believing that your sole purpose in the relationship is to please him. Even so, he will try to make you feel guilty anytime you decide to enjoy the union.
A one-sided relationship is more of a slave and master association than an intimate couple is. In extreme cases, sexual narcissists will control every aspect of their partner’s lives, disconnecting them from the rest of the world.
Are you in a relationship with a sexual narcissist? A sexual narcissist cares more about portraying a happy relationship. Yet, he does nothing to make his spouse feel loved and wanted. If you’re a victim, understand and appreciate your self-worth. That way, you can take measures to protect your emotional wellbeing because such links can drain a spouse leading to stress and depression.