We all need mother wound healing. See, the mother-daughter bond is one of the most powerful ever. It may be because she nurtured you during pregnancy and probably breastfed you. However, it goes way beyond that. Your emotional awareness is strongly affected by the mother figure in your life, even if you were adopted.

Unfortunately, many mothers live on the edge of a cliff, due to the patriarchal society we now live in. Today’s social norms push mothers to fend for everyone else at the exclusion of their own potential. In short, they end up taking on more than they can handle. They end up passing this traumatic experience to their daughters, who will, later on, pass it to their daughters.

This results in a generational passing of self-sabotaging, self-abandonment, self-disrespect, and self-awareness. The generational pain that mothers pass on to their daughters is what we refer to as a mother wound.

What is Mother Wound Healing?

The mother wound concept refers to the generational pain passed down between grandmothers, mothers, and then to their daughters. The generational pain and trauma are caused by living in a harshly patriarchal culture that is oppressive to women.

The oppressive patriarchal culture conditions women to think that they are:

• Non-deserving;
• Unworthy;
• And lesser beings in society.

By existing in such a society, girls often grow up to be women socialized to abide by the social doctrines of patriarchy. They, therefore, play small to accommodate and tolerate others, all while devaluing and abandoning themselves.

The result is women that tend deeply toward others and forget to explore their full potential.

If this pain is not resolved, mothers can easily pass it down to their daughters. Girls raised by mothers who have internalized these negative messages often adopt the trauma. The result will be girls who grow into women who:

• Abandon their authenticity;
• Sacrifice their needs for others;
• Crave for constant validation;
• Overlook their powers and potential.

The pattern of self-abandonment is inherited from one generation to the next. However, one woman in the generation can step aside and break the chain. And that woman could be you. You could identify the childhood trauma and signs that a mother wound was instilled in you and work your way out of it.

 It is a way to regain your abilities to spread your wings for the better and give your next generation a healthy environment to grow in. Before we discuss healing, let’s niche down further. 

Who Experiences Mother Wound?

Daughters of mothers living in a patriarchal society are often the victims of mother wounds. However, some psychologists suggest that mothers can instill this wound in their sons. Women in marginalized groups are also significantly affected by the side effects of the mother wound. These groups include:

• Immigrant women;
• Women of color;
• Women that are living in poverty.

Society has harsh expectations of these marginalized women and still expects them to become strong. Unfortunately, trauma and pain passed down to their daughters are all that come out.

Daughters have a high chance of experiencing a mother wound if their mother:

• focused on providing material support and not emotional support such as love, care, and security; 
• was not empathetic to mirror their feelings and help them manage their emotions;
• prohibited the child from expressing their negative feelings;
• was too critical of even the most minor things;
• expected the daughters to fend for their emotional and physical needs;
• was absent for one reason or another, such as work;
• was an alcoholic or a drug addict;
• suffered from untreated mental disorders;
• was a victim of emotional or/and physical abuse and did not resolve the trauma, making them unable to nurture and love. 

By reflecting on these aspects of your childhood, you may determine if you suffer from a mother wound. However, these are not always a guarantee. For instance, a mother can keep their job without instilling a mother wound in their child.

Signs That You Are Experiencing a Mother Wound

A mother wound is picked up in childhood and carried to adulthood. If the trauma is not resolved, the signs will manifest in your everyday life. The signs are often subtle; you can always connect them to your childhood. 

Watch out for the following signs as they may indicate suffering from a mother wound:

• Feeling pressure to adhere to strict rules and expectations of womanhood;
• Taking care of others to the point of exhaustion;
• Fear of spreading your wings to actualize your full potential because you are afraid it will threaten others;
• Fear of exploring your potential in fear of failure or disapproval;
• Unexplained resentment and bitterness towards your children;
• Feeling pressurized to get a better life than your mother, even if it means not being true to yourself;
• Unconsciously fishing for your mother’s approval and permission even in your adulthood;
• Inability to practice self-care and ask for help when you need it;
• Feelings of discomfort whenever you spend time or money on self-care;
• Constantly questioning whether something is wrong with you or if you are good enough. 

Many adult behaviors are linked to coping with a mother wound. Talking to your therapist about it can help you be more self-aware. 

Effects of a Mother Wound

A mother wound adversely affects your ability to explore your potential. Any woman can suffer from a mother wound. But as we stated earlier, marginalized women are the most affected. This is why it is usually a big deal whenever marginalized women achieve something that the oppressive society puts out of reach for them. 

For instance, despite the shift in things in the modern world today, it is often a big deal when women of color or immigrant women make it within many professional fields.

Here is how the mother wound affects its victims:

• Low self-esteem; 
• Relationship difficulties due to their inability to trust;
• Lack of self-awareness, especially with managing feelings and emotions.

Mother Wound Healing

If the effects of a mother wound are not resolved, you risk passing it to the next generations. You want your children to grow in a healthy, supportive, and loving environment. You also risk staying in trauma and never exploring your full power and potential. This is why you need to resolve the trauma and pain. 

Here are top tips to help you with mother wound healing:

• Express and acknowledge the trauma and pain: therapy and journaling are excellent ways to do this;
• Mother yourself and go strong on self-care;
• Forgive your mother and look at her as she is and not what she could have been;
• Prioritize yourself; 
• Work on self-awareness, especially in understanding and managing your feelings rather than dismissing them. 

The Bottom Line

It is easier for anyone suffering from a mother wound to blame their mothers. Unfortunately, this way, you keep sinking yourself deep into the trauma which affects your everyday life. And, you may sip it to your daughters. 

The way out is to get therapy, acknowledge your feelings, and learn how you spread your wings despite what society might be telling you. Resolving the trauma means a happier you and happier future generations that will grow with the necessary emotional, mental and physical love and care. 

Go out there and break the generational inheritance of pain and trauma. 

Is your furry friend behaving unusually lately? Have they been on meds for any illness or injury? Well, it’s time to try Reiki for dogs. We know the pain of living with a sad pet as dog owners. Most of us, if not all, will do anything to see our dogs happy and excitedly running around the house again, right? Reiki has proven to be an excellent solution for different dog problems, psychological or physical.

Whereas this ancient Japanese healing practice is highly recommended for dogs dealing with physical, mental, or emotional ailments, it is also great for your dog’s general wellness.

So, What Is Reiki for Dogs?

Reiki is a healing practice that involves using life force energy for healing people, animals, and even plants. The life force energy is what brings healing to most ailments and boosts their general well-being. It’s important to mention that this life force energy is channeled through a practitioner and flows to your dog. The practitioner never generates or contributes any energy. 

Usually, only a Reiki practitioner can perform Reiki therapy. However, anyone can become a Reiki practitioner after undergoing a Reiki attunement.

How Does Reiki Work?

A good Reiki session is conducted in the morning or evening when the weather is cooler and the winds calmer. We can do Reiki as a hands-on therapy session or at a distance. It all depends on your furry friend. However, note that the session’s success entirely depends on your dog.

Once the Reiki healer is in the house, your dog has to decide to join the session. And you can’t force them. We must also provide a calm, quiet environment where your dog feels safe. And sometimes, this means you are joining in the session. 

Your dog will decide whether to receive a hands-on Reiki session or enjoy it at a distance. It will also determine the length of the session. Your dog will know when it has had enough, so you don’t need to time the session.

The Benefits of Reiki for Dogs

There are many advantages of using Reiki therapy on your dog. Some of them include:

Excellent anxiety, stress, and depression reliever for your dog

Like human beings, animals can get stressed. Your canine friend might be self-harming or acting aggressively due to anxiety or depression caused by a traumatic event. A Reiki healer provides a calm space where your dog can relax. The entire Reiki session is generally very calming.

Helps you bond with your dog

In a session where you are invited to join your pet, Reiki offers an opportunity to bond with your dog. It can work wonders, especially when dealing with a dog with psychological problems. Remember, not all issues will be physical. Some will be psychological, and you will need a keen eye to notice.

Can help your dog cope with illness and recover from injuries

Most animals struggle with a disease or when recovering from an injury. Such discomfort can elevate their stress levels. Reiki helps your dog cope with its illness or recover from its injury by reducing these stress levels.

Boosts your dog’s immune system.

The Reiki practice has been shown to increase the production of antibodies and white blood cells. Consequently, it can help your dog fight illness and reduce your pet’s visits to the vet. 

A non-invasive therapy

Reiki does not involve drugs or needles for treatment. Your furry little friend will experience no discomfort or pain during the session. They don’t even have to be touched by the Reiki healer. They can transfer the healing energy at a distance.

Reiki can help enhance the well-being and general wellness of your dog

Reiki energy can help balance your dog’s energy. The flow of the energy in your dog can bring about deep relaxation and release tension or pain. It can also eliminate negative energy from your dog, boosting its general wellness.

Sometimes Reiki Might Not Work on Your Dog

As beneficial as Reiki is, it might not work on every dog. Here are some reasons why;

Reiki works for the greater good of all.

Reiki is believed to have a mind of its own. The energy will do what it needs to do, which is not always what you want. Reiki’s job is to do whatever is for the greater good of all. Don’t be surprised when you fail to get the results you want.

Reiki only works on willing subjects.

Your dog has to be willing to accept the energy for it to work. We cannot force the energy on subjects. As much as you would like your dog to benefit from Reiki, there is no way around them if they don’t want it. The energy won’t work when forced on a subject.

How Will I Know If Reiki Is Working on My Dog?

Any sign of relaxation is a confirmation that Reiki is working on your dog. If we start the session while the dog is standing, it will lie down voluntarily and eventually fall asleep or close its eyes. However, some dogs may not show any relaxation signs, especially those too hyper to relax.

Can I Give Reiki for Dogs at Home?

Absolutely, yes. Learning how to give Reiki to your dog can help with your bonding. It will also offer you an opportunity to enjoy the relaxing benefits of Reiki. The more you practice giving Reiki, the more skilled you become. If you find it enjoyable, you can even enroll to become a Reiki certified practitioner and get paid to work with other pets. 

Moreover, as you learn how to give Reiki, you’ll be able to offer more sessions to your dog, and you can turn it into a regular morning or evening routine.

How to Give Reiki Healing to a Dog?

Reiki healing for pets is almost no different from giving Reiki healing to people.

When healing dogs, put your hands where it is more convenient for you. I usually start the session by putting my hands behind the dog’s ears, because this position helps the dog calm down. Then you can move your hands and place one hand on the dog’s chest and another – on its back. But be careful here – do not put your hands directly on the dog’s heart area!

Don’t worry if you can’t get your hands all over the dog’s body, because Reiki flows through any position and can reach any area of the body.

If the dog is injured or just had surgery, do not touch the wound during the Reiki healing session. In this case, a distance Reiki session makes more sense.

The time of the Reiki session may vary. When you will feel that the energy stops flowing, it’s time to end the session. Or, the dog will just get up and leave. This also means that you can end the session.

Conclusion

Reiki is a great healing practice for dogs. Its benefits are undisputed. From boosting your dog’s immune system to helping it deal with different psychological and physical issues, the practice is next-level. However, we cannot use Reiki as a substitute or replacement for routine veterinary care.

The inner child is our original deep essence and the basis of our self-expression, creativity, and spontaneity. Our connection with the inner child determines how much we can enjoy life, be spontaneous and playful, and to what extent we allow ourselves to dream and creatively express ourselves. However, many of us have experienced childhood trauma that has unfortunately wounded our inner child. It could have been something as significant as physical abuse or simply losing a favorite toy that left us traumatized. You may not even think about that adverse event anymore. However, it may still affect the quality of your life as an adult. Therefore, inner child healing is so essential for most of us.

In this article, I want to share different methods that can help you heal the child within. I believe that these powerful methods can help rebuild a more robust and deeper connection with your inner child. They may also shed light on your past traumas and make you more aware and provide direction for your future shadow work and inner healing.

What Is the Inner Child?

The inner child is that part of our psyche where our childhood memories, feelings, needs, and the foundations of world perception are stored. Moreover, the inner child gives an impulse that manifests creative energy into our existence. Through our connection with our inner child, creative energy can manifest itself in us, filling our lives with unconditional joy, playfulness, and an unlimited perception of reality.

Each of us has a child within, and that inner child does not disappear when we grow up, but on the contrary, it can actively manifest itself in our behaviors as adults, in our reactions to specific events, and in our desires and needs.

What Is the Wounded Inner Child?

A wounded inner child is a child whose basic needs have not been met. Such needs could be:

#1: Safety

This need implies that parents create a space for the child in which they can grow and develop without fear for their life. This applies not only to physical safety but also to psychological and emotional. Here are some examples of when such a need is not met:

• lack of safe home;
• lack of food;
• verbal abuse;
• emotional abuse;
• witnessing violence against others;
• physical abuse/physical punishment;
• when a child lives in a family with a hidden or obvious hostility between parents or other family members.

#2: Love and unconditional acceptance

The unsatisfied need for love in childhood leads to the fact that people are afraid to show their feelings in adulthood, and it is difficult for them to even talk about love.

An unmet need for acceptance can be expressed in different ways, for example, when:

• parents wanted a son, but a girl was born instead (or vice versa);
• a child likes to draw, but his parents make him play soccer;
• the unique qualities of a child are ridiculed;
• parents cannot stand the tears of a child and do everything so that he does not cry;
• a child is not allowed to get angry or feel any negative emotions, etc.

#3: The need for a parent figure

When one or both parents are absent from a child’s life, he gets traumatized. As he grows up, he tries to satisfy this need at the expense of others, whom he sees as symbolic parental figures. And then, even sometimes realizing the absurdity of the demands of such people, such a person will try to please them and earn their approval. Often people with an unsatisfied need for a parent figure also demand from others what they did not get from an absent parent.

#4: Growth

The need for growth is met when a child is allowed to make mistakes. When adults constantly scold a child for his errors, trauma occurs. A very indecisive adult grows out of such a child. Such a person would rather do nothing than take a risk and make a mistake.

#5: The need for separation

This is the need to grow up and the ability to take responsibility for your life. This also includes setting personal boundaries with your parents. If this need is not met, such people often have a co-dependent relationship with their parents.

In addition, the causes of childhood trauma could be:

• a loss of a favorite toy;
• transfer to a new kindergarten or school;
• moving to another city;
• parents’ divorce;
• birth of a sibling;
• loss of a loved one;
• a need to take care of parents or other family members in childhood;
• any actions of a sexual nature directed at a child;
• excessive responsibilities assigned to the child, etc.

Healing the Inner Child

Inner child healing is the healing of an individual’s wounded adolescent self through communication, understanding, and acceptance. When we give our inner children unconditional love, compassion, and nurturing, they respond to us with an open-hearted embrace. Only when we are reconnected with our inner child can we experience the purest form of self-love and build healthy relationships with others.

Now, let me share four effective practices that will help you heal your child within.

#1: Let your inner child talk

Children learn by asking lots of questions. Likewise, our healing practice starts by asking the inner child questions about our forgotten dreams, expectations, hopes, and fears.

Set aside some quiet time alone. It could be in your meditation room, bedroom, beside a campfire in your backyard, or a picnic spot at the park. Set up your relaxing area, then ask your inner child these questions and listen to the answers:

• What do you wish your parents knew about you?
• What gets you excited and happy every morning?
• What would you do if you won a million-dollar jackpot today?
• If you were to advise your adult self, what would you tell them? What would you want this adult to remember about you?
• If you were to re-write your life story, how would it read? Who would you want the main characters to be?
• If you were to relocate, where would you like to live?

Let your inner child talk! Don’t let your rational mind and logic take control over this practice. Let it be spontaneous and intuitive.

These questions will help you reconnect with our brains’ frozen, immature parts. It takes us back to that traumatic childhood past, highlighting how it affects our adult lives. Next, we come up with remedies to recondition the mind to undo all those biased thoughts about ourselves or life. This simple practice will open up a gateway to long-forgotten possibilities, and help you pick up from when you last stopped dreaming or being ambitious.

#2: Inner child affirmations

Inner child healing affirmations are short phrases containing a verbal inner child healing formula that, when repeated many times, activates the healing process in your subconscious, contributing to improving your psycho-emotional background and stimulating positive changes in your life.

While saying the inner child affirmations look in the mirror or the sky, or simply close your eyes and focus on your inner child image. Alternatively, you can use your childhood picture and look at it while saying the affirmations.

You can create your own list of the inner child affirmations or use the list below:

• I love my inner child unconditionally.
• I listen to my inner child’s needs and take care of them.
• I trust my inner child.
• My inner child deserves to have a voice, and I listen to that voice.
• I respect my childlike innocence.
• I validate my inner child’s feelings.
• My inner child feels safe through my actions.
• Along with my inner child, I am whole and complete.

#3: Recreate what you loved to do as a child

Do you remember what you loved to do as a child? Maybe you liked to color or enjoyed making arts and crafts, or perhaps you loved to climb trees, play dress-up, or dance? Whatever it was, embrace the things that made you feel happiest as a child and revisit your childhood favorites. Don’t worry about how you look or what others may think; just do it, and your heart will come alive. Some things may be more challenging to do than when you were a kid but don’t let that stop you from practicing, playing, and having fun with them.

When you start doing what you liked when you were a child, you will re-discover your creative potential and find that joy that was forgotten due to the burden of adult responsibilities.

#4: Inner child meditation

This is one of the most powerful ways to reconnect with your inner child. To perform the meditation, find a place where nobody can disturb you. You can sit or lie down. If you prefer to meditate in a sitting position, make sure that your back has constant support to maintain a straight body position. You can also lie on your back in a comfortable position. Close your eyes.

Take three deep inhales, and three exhales. With each exhalation, feel your body is getting more and more relaxed.

Now, take three more deep inhales and three exhales. With each exhalation, feel your mind getting calmer and still.

Now, visualize a place you enjoyed visiting when you were a child. This should be a safe place that makes you feel happy and calm. This place is your inner sanctuary where your inner child feels safe.

Now, imagine the path to your inner sanctuary and walk along it, focusing on the feelings of relaxation, peace, and comfort. When you finally reach your sanctuary, feel its beauty and comfort. Take a few minutes to recall any details about this place. Enjoy what is there. Mentally walk around this place, paying attention to plants and animals. What’s the weather like there? Feel the sun on your skin or a fresh breeze.

Now, look in front of you and see a small child. This is your inner child. Start walking towards the child. How old is he/her? What are they doing? Go towards the child slowly.

When you get closer, take a closer look at the appearance of a child. Try to feel what emotions the child feels.

Your inner child’s eyes should tell you a lot. See if they are sad or joyful. See the hopes of your inner child in their eyes. Hug your inner child and let them sit on your lap. Let them snuggle up to you. Feel their warmth and allow your heart to respond to this gesture. Make your inner child feel safe and protected with you.

Ask your inner child to tell you what actions they expect from you. Promise them that you will always take care of them.

Let your inner child understand that they are heard, taken care of, and protected.

Tell your inner child how grateful you are for them talking to you, how much you love them, and that from now on, they are safe.

At the end of the meditation, slowly release your inner child from your embrace and let them go. Say goodbye to them. Leave your safe place.

Take a few deep breaths in and out again, and slowly open your eyes.

The Bottom Line

Inner child healing is an essential step in the self-healing journey. Without healing the child within, it’s impossible to heal past trauma and build healthy relationships. The above inner child healing practices are an excellent way to start your inner child healing.