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Karmic Relationship Healing: Effective Practice To Let Your Past Go!

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karmic relationship healing image

Your present is a reflection of your past worldview. Take a look around! Everything you have today is the result of your thoughts and actions in the past. If you’re not happy with your life or have problems with relationships you probably need to consider a karmic relationship healing.

As long as you’re attached to your past you give your energy to it. Thereby you take away the energy from the present. When you’re constantly reflecting on memories in your head (no matter if they are pleasant or unpleasant) it leads to a biased perception of the present moment. The present moment, in turn, has an impact on what your future will be. If there is not enough energy in the present moment, it will be even less in the future. Thus, your thoughts about the past have an impact not only on your present but also creates an energy deficit in your future.

Karmic Relationship Healing And Chakras

Very often other people “pull” us into the past. It can be people that hurt us, people we hurt, people with whom we argued, people we broke up with, etc. The memories of these people (conscious or subconscious) take energy through the energy cords that block our chakras.

Energy cord is an energy channel, which is formed as a result of a violation of harmonious energy interaction of a person with other people and forms attachments.

Negative emotions form cords on the corresponding chakras.

Karmic cords image

The Danger Of Energy Cords

The energy cords are dangerous because they cause energy failures in the energy field: from slowing the flow of energy to its complete stop in a certain chakra.

In addition, the cords significantly aggravate the communication, depriving you of liberty, weaken your connection with your Higher Self, and inhibit your development.

energy cords image

If your negative emotions are very strong, they can form energy cords that can persist for several incarnations. Moreover, in each new incarnation, you will attract those souls with whom you have energy cords again and again. And this circle of incarnations among the same souls will continue until you release yourself from these cords. Such a circle of incarnations, tied to the same souls, is called ”karmic connection”.

It is the absence of attachments (energy cords) that is an indicator of a free spirit. Therefore, in order to fully and harmoniously develop, it is necessary to get rid of karmic cords and free yourself from attachments.

Liberation from the energy cords does not imply the destruction of the energy connection between people but means the acquisition of freedom at the disposal of one’s life. For example, freed from the attachment to parents, you will not stop loving them and will not lose their love, but will find a harmonious relationship without pressure and manipulation.

The Most Common Attachments

Now let’s take a look at the most common energy cords that can affect your life in a very negative way.

Resentment

This energy cord has a negative impact on health. When you feel offended, in your thoughts you return to your offender, again and again, thereby generously giving your vital energy to your offender.

Guilt

This cord is based on your aggression directed at yourself. When we feel guilty, we realize that we can not correct what we’ve done. In our mind, we constantly analyze the thoughts of how we can beg forgiveness from the one who we hurt, and what we can do to make amends. As a result of systematic analyzing of such thoughts, the energy cord is formed.

Jealousy, Dependence, Passion

These kinds of cords arise when one person has a need to possess another person. He constantly thinks about the object of his lust, dreams about it, passionately wanting to get what he wants. Such thoughts create a strong energy cord.

Unrequited love

This cord has a very strong negative impact on health. It pulls out a very large amount of energy from the one who loves, and the one who’s loved. Naturally, here we are talking about illusory love because true love is always unconditional and brings only positive emotions.

illusory vs unconditional love image

Revenge

This cord is created as a result of building a plan of revenge in your head.

Pity, desire to save

This kind of cord is formed by ego. It is the ego that thinks that you are a Savior and a hero, makes you think that you are doing a good job, constantly “hanging” other people’s problems on your shoulders, and thinking that without your help and support people cannot cope. However, at the energy level, a cord is formed, on which your energy flows away towards the person you are so desperately trying to save. Thus, you become a donor for the energy vampire. Such a binding blocks both: your own development (because you simply do not have enough energy for it) and the development of the person to whom you are so actively helping to solve problems (because you take away from him/her the necessary life lessons for evolution and spiritual growth). As a result, interfering in the life of another person, you form a strong karmic connection.

Parent cords

parents control image

These cords are based on the desire to control your child. As a rule, parents explain their behavior with care and love, but this is a big mistake. Love cannot exist where there are an addiction and a desire to subjugate another person. Love lives only where freedom exists. If parents do not accept their child as an independent person and do not give him full freedom of self-realization, their energy completely blocks his main chakras, which prevents him from successfully building his personal life.

Karmic Relationship Healing Practice

No matter what kind of energy cords and attachments we have there is always something we can do. I’m talking about self-healing. Let me share with you a very powerful practice that provides a karmic relationship healing. This practice is aimed at the liberation from negative energy cords to a particular person.

First, you need to find out who you are attached to. Give yourself time to think about it. Who comes to mind most often? Write down the names of all the people you think about most often. After all, these are the people you have karmic cords with.

Writing notes image

Now you have a list of people to whom you are energetically attached. Follow the practice below, starting with the first person on your list.

  1. Light a candle with the intention to get rid of negative energy cords to … (say the name and last name of the person).
  2. Take a relaxed position, close your eyes.
  3. Invite the Higher self of the person you’re trying to let go and heal your karma from. To do this, say three times: “I invite the Higher Self of … (name and last name of the person) for karmic relationship healing and for removing the negative energy cords that exist between us for the sake of our Highest Good.”
  4. Visualize in your imagination this person in front of you. Imagine how a Golden ray comes out of his (her) Solar Plexus Chakra and enters your Solar Plexus Chakra. Concentrate on that ray.
  5. Visualize that you’re looking into the eyes of the person. Say 8 times: “I sincerely forgive you for everything you’ve done!”
  6. Keep concentrating on the Golden Ray. This is your connection with the person. Through this ray, his (her) Higher Self receives messages from you in this meditation. Look into the eyes of the person, say 8 times: “Please forgive me for everything I’ve done!”
  7. Keep looking into the eyes of the person, say 8 times: “I sincerely and from the bottom of my heart thank you for everything you’ve done!”
  8. Now embrace this person in your imagination, and imagine the Golden-green ray of love coming out of your Heart chakra and going into his (her) Heart chakra. Accompany this ray with your love and words: “I love you!” (say 8 times).
  9. Now, in your imagination, move away from this person at arm’s length, and imagine how from each of your chakras to his respective chakras stretch cords similar to wires (there are seven of them).
  10. Pick up an imaginary lighter, light it and start annealing each cord, starting with the cord that connects your Muladhara chakras and finishing with the cord that connects your Crown chakras. Accomplish these actions with the words: “I completely forgive and let you go!» (8 times).
  11. Once you’ve annealed the last cord on your Crown chakras, imagine a wall of flame between you and the visualized person. At the same time, each of you is surrounded by a Golden cocoon of divine love. These Golden cocoons are healing all your wounds from annealing cords. Watch the flame between you, and as it burns, keep saying, “I’m letting you go!”.
  12. When the flame has dissipated, you will see yourself alone, surrounded by a Golden light, and realize that all the emotions and limitations that have been enclosed in the cords are only an illusion, a life lesson that you have passed.
  13. Thank the Universe for this lesson.
    Slowly open your eyes.

The number of such practices for each case is individual. It depends on the binding force. Sometimes it is enough to do this practice just one time. But still, to consolidate the result, it is better to do it 8 times for each person you’re trying to heal your karmic relationship with.

It is desirable to do a karmic relationship healing with all your friends. Don’t worry, the communication with them won’t stop if you’re interested in it.

After this practice, the person with whom you severed the energy cords, will feel that you have stopped feeding him (her) with your energy and will try to remind you of himself (herself). It can be a phone call, e-mail, another attempt to put pressure on you or something else. In other words, he (she) will try to provoke you to get emotional about something, so that you, once again, under the influence of his provocation, give him your energy. He (she) will do his (her) best to restore the cords. In this case, try to behave kindly with him (her), do not succumb to provocations. After that repeat your karmic relationship healing practice with this person once again to fix the result.

The Bottom Line

You can do karmic relationship healing practice as many times as you need. Sometimes I feel that I need to do it again with the same people I already healed my karma from. Our life changes every second of our existence. Today we feel like we have no attachments but when tomorrow comes we may feel that our old attachments rise again. If you feel that communication with some people isn’t pleasurable for you anymore it means on the energy level you have cords to these people. And through these cords, you’re losing your energy. Before you distance yourself from these people do yourself a favor – do a karmic relationship healing first. I’m sure you don’t want to attract the same kinds of communication problems in the future.

Katya Ki is the Founder of SOLANCHA Magazine, a Metaphysical Expert, a Reiki Master, and Human Rights Attorney. She has been studying Eastern metaphysics, cosmology, and esotericism for almost 20 years now. And she's still discovering new knowledge, which is hidden in ancient teachings. During her pilgrimage to the monastery of Saint Catherine in Egypt, she discovered the SOLANCHA System. This is how the SOLANCHA journey started!

Awareness

7 Signs You are a Healer and Don’t Know It

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Signs You are a Healer Image

Healers have existed since ancient times. Healing abilities were passed down from generation to generation and have come down to our times. However, some people do not even know that they have the gift of a healer. It is transmitted to them at the genetic or spiritual level, and often this gift is brought from past lives. Many of us live with this special gift without even knowing about our healing potential. If you’re wondering if you are a spiritual healer, this article is for you! In this article, we will share with you 7 signs you are a healer.

7 Signs You are a Healer

Here are 7 telltale signs you are a healer that you shouldn’t ignore!

#1: You are an empath

As an empath, you instinctively feel what others feel. You are very sensitive to the energies/vibrations that surround you, both thoughts and emotions, of other people, animals, plants, and even spirits.

Being an empath makes you capable of feeling if someone else is experiencing pain long before they even say so. However, you should be careful as you run the risk of picking up that pain and mistaking it for your own.

#2: You have a strong connection with nature

born healer image

Nature is the source of vital energy. As a natural healer, you are, by definition, close to nature. Do you love to walk in the forest or by the ocean? Do you enjoy the sound of running water? Do you like to be around animals or surround yourself with plants and trees? Of course, you do, because this works great for natural healers like you as you feel that being in nature helps you to ground yourself and clear your aura from negativity or excessive energy. You may not even think about it but you just feel the need of being close to nature to “recharge” yourself.

#3: Strangers open up to you easily

Because of your empathic abilities, strangers feel comfortable and safe to open up to you and share their problems with you. Deep inside people intuitively feel that you can help them and therefore are attracted to you. The fact that someone decides to talk to you about a problem is an important step in the healing process. Your ability to listen, comfort, and support people is healing itself.

#4: You attract animals on your path

One of the signs you are a healer is your ability to attract animals on your path.

animal healer image

Do animals seem to follow you when you walk alone? Are cats, dogs, birds, or other animals attracted to you? Have you ever noticed that aggressive pets change their nervous behavior when meeting with you to friendly, or even affectionate? If this describes you then it could be a sign that you are a healer. Natural healers radiate the energy of a certain frequency that is visible to animals. When sensing the healing vibrations coming from you, animals want to be closer to you.

And this applies not only to pets. There are known cases when enraged wild animals unexpectedly not only calmed down when meeting with some people but also did not show aggressiveness. It is likely that this is how they indicated a meeting with healers.

#5: Your palms can radiate heat

People who are able to help others with the warmth of their hands, undoubtedly, have certain abilities. This kind of heat is not always felt only when you touch it. It is enough just to bring the palm closer to some part of the body, as this heat is felt by the patient.

This heat is a healing energy that is always active whenever someone in need for healing is around you.

#6: You tend to have vivid dreams

astral attack image

Do you tend to have vivid dreams? The unseen realm may be communicating with you through your dreams. You can receive information, advice, or instructions for solving problems and helping other people in your dreams. These dreams can even be prophetic.

Therefore, you should try analyzing your dreams carefully. If you don’t have a dream journal, it’s time to start one! Pay particular attention to any symbols, signs, or animal totems that may appear in your dreams, for these symbols, signs, and animals could be trying to send you an important message.

#7: You are very intuitive

Another sign you could be a healer is your good intuition. Do you have a very strong inner compass? Are your gut reactions usually spot on? Do you feel negative energy coming from some people even without looking or talking to them? Can you feel when particular places and buildings could be dangerous for spending time there even if they look safe and peaceful for others? Then you could be a natural healer.

You see, healers are naturally very intuitive and can sense and see what most people can’t. If this describes you, make sure you pay attention to your intuition, even if it contradicts what your rational mind is telling you.

Are You a Born Healer?

7 signs you are a born healer image

After reading the above 7 signs of being a healer, do you feel like this describes you? If this sounds like you, it’s time to embrace your healing potential and share your gifts with the world. Maybe you can even consider a healing job or at least doing your current job in some healing way.

If you are a born healer, you have that internal desire to help others. Think about different ways you can share your healing gifts. However, make sure you have healthy boundaries with your patients and don’t take their problems and pains as your own. Remember to always ground yourself, cleanse your aura, and practice energy hygiene.

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Healing

Crystals For Chakras: How to Restore Your Energy Flow

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Crystals for chakras Image

Crystals have certain vibrations and a unique configuration of subtle energies. There are crystals that resonate with our energy centers that are able to harmonize and balance our chakras. The proper interaction with these stones and crystals can change the vibration of our cells and energy fields and improve our mental and physical health. In this article, we will share with you the most powerful crystals for chakras that can help you to balance and harmonize them.

Crystals and Chakras

Life is the circulation of energy. Energy flows through our bodies along the energy meridians and is concentrated in the energy centers – the chakras. Chakras are a kind of accumulator and at the same time generator of vital energy – Qi. Each chakra corresponds to the energy of its own frequency and of certain vibrations, such as color (wavelength) or the sound of a special mantra (frequency of sound vibrations).

The lower chakras (Muladhara, Svadhisthana, and Manipura) resonate with the lower frequencies of the earth, and the upper chakras (Anahata, Vishuddha, Ajna, and Sahasrara) respond to the high-frequency vibrations of the Cosmos. Thus, the human body is considered as an open system that is part of the general energy system “Earth-Human-Space”.

Essential Oils For Chakras Image

There are seven main chakras. Each of them is responsible for a certain sphere of human activity. Each chakra has its own color and is associated with a certain part of our body, as well as certain characteristics and aspects of our life.

Our chakras respond to the energy of the colors that we see during the day in nature, in food, and clothing. And when the chakras get into contact with the energy of stones, minerals, and crystals, they perceive it very actively. Therefore, so many healers use crystals for chakra balancing.

If you have a weak chakra and you feel a lack of energy in it, wear crystals that resonate with it as jewelry for its gentle healing and balancing. This is a gentle and safe method of chakra healing, which you can safely do on your own.

Stones and Crystals For Chakras

Root Chakra (Muladhara)

Muladhara Chakra Crystals Image

For Muladhara healing and balancing, use black, brown and red stones:

  • Red Jasper
  • Red Aventurine
  • Red Pyrope Garnet
  • Red Calcite
  • Black Tourmaline
  • Smoky Quartz
  • Carnelian
  • Black Jasper
  • Hawkeye Stone
  • Dravite Tourmaline
  • Pyrope
  • Black Obsidian
  • Rhodochrosite
  • Hematite
  • Jet
  • Eudialyte
  • Chiastolite (Cross Stone)
  • Hematite
  • Tektite
  • Lava
  • Black Onyx
  • Black Jade

Sacral Chakra (Svadhisthana)

Crystals For Svadhisthana Chakra Image

For Svadhisthana chakra healing and balancing, use orange, peach, and brown stones:

  • Orange Spinel
  • Carnelian
  • Imperial Topaz
  • Sunstone
  • Amber
  • Sardonyx
  • Fire Opal
  • Apricot Botswana Agate
  • Spessartine Garnet
  • Peach Moonstone
  • Orange Calcite
  • Peach Selenite

Solar Plexus Chakra (Manipura)

Crystals For Manipura Chakra Image

For Manipura chakra healing and balancing, use yellow and gold stones:

  • Jasper
  • Citrine
  • Yellow Onyx
  • Yellow Topaz
  • Golden Calcite
  • Golden Tiger’s Eye
  • Yellow Tourmaline
  • Pineapple Calcite
  • Yellow Sapphire
  • Golden Quartz
  • Yellow Selenite
  • Heliodor
  • Pyrite
  • Golden Fluorite

Heart Chakra (Anahata)

Crystals for Anahata chakra Image

For Anahata chakra healing and balancing, use green and pink stones:

  • Green Aventurine
  • Moss Agate
  • Rose Quartz
  • Alexandrite
  • Emerald
  • Amazonite
  • Peridot
  • Heliotrope
  • Malachite
  • Grossular
  • Rhodochrosite
  • Diopside
  • Pink Calcite
  • Unakite
  • Uvarovite
  • Watermelon Tourmaline
  • Morganite
  • Rhodonite

Throat Chakra (Vishuddha)

Crystals For Vishuddha Chakra Image

For Vishuddha chakra healing and balancing, use light blue, blue, and teal stones:

  • Larimar
  • Aquamarine
  • Celestite
  • Amazonite
  • Angelite
  • Blue Topaz
  • Kyanite
  • Blue Lace Agate
  • Ajoite Quartz
  • Blue Tourmaline
  • Aqua Aura Quartz
  • Turquoise
  • Chrysocolla
  • Blue Quartz

Third Eye Chakra (Ajna)

Crystals For Ajna Image

For Ajna chakra healing and balancing, use indigo and violet stones:

  • Blue Aventurine
  • Tanzanite
  • Indigolite
  • Lapis Lazuli
  • Sodalite
  • Labradorite
  • Azurite
  • Iolite
  • Tanzan Aura Quartz
  • Fluorite
  • Shattuckite
  • Blue Apatite
  • Sapphire
  • Blue Kyanite

Crown Chakra (Sahasrara)

Crystals For Sahasrara Crown Chakra Image

For Sahasrara chakra healing and balancing, use violet, gold, white, and clear stones:

  • Charoite
  • Clear Quartz
  • Amethyst
  • Sugilite
  • Fluorite
  • Rhinestone
  • Clear Calcite
  • Selenite
  • Apophyllite
  • Ametrine
  • Ulexite
  • Spirit Quartz
  • Stichtite

How to Use Crystals for Chakras?

If the chakra is not sufficiently supplied with energy, it always leads to physiological and psychological problems. The energy balance in the body is disturbed, general malaise is felt, diseases appear. Crystals can help to restore the energy level of the chakras, heal, and balance them.

Crystal Chakra Healing Therapy Image

Here are different ways you can use crystals for chakras:

#1: Crystal Meditation

Direct contact with the crystal allows you to raise the vibrations of body cells and energy fields. Meditation is the most profound form of communication with the crystal. Therefore, the best way to use the healing power of the crystals for chakras is to meditate with them. You can hold the crystal in your palms in front of a specific chakra or, if you prefer to meditate in Savasana, you can just place the crystal on the chakra.

#2: Crystal Jewelry

To restore the work of the chakras, you can wear talismans and jewelry with chakra crystals. For balancing your Root chakra wear crystal pendants. For your Solar plexus chakra wear a crystal belt. For your Heart chakra balancing, wear pendants with crystals. For the Throat chakra, wear crystal necklaces. Bracelets on the wrists affect all the chakras, so you can always wear them. If you wear a bracelet on your left hand – the main effect of the stone will be directed at you and if you wear it on the right hand – on the people around you.

#3: Massage

To activate the chakra and remove the blockage, a massage with healing stones or crystals for chakras is a perfect way to get a quick result. Just make sure that the massage of the energy centers is performed gently and safely.

#4: Crystal Charged Water

Healing water, charged with crystals, helps to purify the chakras. To charge the water with healing crystals, use a glass, ceramic, or porcelain jug or bowl.

Place a crystal in a jar, jug, or bowl filled with purified (preferable spring) water and leave it for the night.

You can drink crystal charged water in the morning, or use it for chakra ritual baths.

Don’t forget to cleanse your crystals before and after using them.

The Bottom Line

Crystals for chakras is a simple yet very effective way to balance your energy field and harmonize energy circulation in your chakras. By placing crystals on the chakra centers, the healing vibrations given off by the stone will correct imbalances within the chakra and restore your energy flow.

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Healing

8 Signs You Have a Wounded Inner Child

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wounded inner child signs image

Every child deserves to feel safe, protected, and secure. However, not every child does. Most parents see safety as physical protection from harm, or providing the essentials for their children. Safety also means support on an emotional, psychological, and spiritual level. When we don’t feel safe as children this feeling of endangerment becomes constant and long-lasting, and a huge gaping wound appears in our psyche. Our adult selves often repress this painful wound, but its impacts are profound and far-reaching. In this article, I want to introduce you to 8 common signs that indicate that you have a wounded inner child.

However, in order for this article to be a useful source for you, I need you to get into a reflective space in your mind where you can openly reflect on your own childhood and how you felt as a child. It’s very important to ask yourself such questions as:

  • Did I feel safe?
  • Did I feel a sense of belonging in my family?
  • Was I permitted to be myself?
  • Do I still have any resentment coming from my childhood?
  • What is my current relationship with my inner child like?

Use this article for introspection and self-reflection. Please, understand that inner child healing is one of the most serious and profound forms of inner work you can do.

What Is the Inner Child?

inner child healing meditation Image

The inner child is a “part” of our personality that stores all our memories, feelings, needs, reactions, attitudes towards ourselves and others, and behaviors that we have preserved from our childhood.

In other words, your inner child is the child that lives within you, to be exact – within your psyche. It is important that we stay connected with this sensitive part of ourselves. When we are connected to our inner child, we feel excited, enthusiastic, and inspired by life. 

If in childhood some of our important psychological needs were not met, then our inner child “gets stuck” and can not continue to grow and develop. Inner child healing can help us to face our fears and insecurities that were created in our childhood and heal these inner wounds.

What Is the Wounded Inner Child?

The wounded inner child is the part of us that bears the imprint of our psychological traumas.

Trauma is our psychological wound. This is our reaction to some event or many similar events that our psyche could not cope with. And as a result, it was divided into the injured part (i.e., our wounded inner child) and the part of the protector.

Such a traumatic event could be as:
  • something extreme. For example, an attack, a fire, a war, someone’s murder, a natural disaster, etc. All these extreme events lead to shock trauma.
  • a lot of unpleasant, more “casual” events, but recurring regularly. For example, psychological violence, violation of agreements on the part of the parent, lack of attention, rejection, unacceptance of some qualities or behavior patterns, etc. These “casual” events lead to relationship trauma.

Our traumatized inner child encourages us to face similar painful events (that caused trauma) again and again to attract our attention so we can finally heal our wounds. And the other part of us, our inner protector, wants to avoid meeting with such an event to protect us from pain.

This inner protector, which protects us from repeating the trauma of the relationship, can manifest itself in us through the fear of intimacy when we are afraid to let another person close to us, or even afraid to enter into a relationship. The fear of close relationships is formed in us as a result of the trauma of relationships.

The inner child healing takes place through the healing of its “wounded part”. That is, through working with the trauma of the relationship. And as a result of the healing, our ability to have close, trusting, loving relationships with others increases.

Here’s How to Tell Your Inner Child Is Wounded

1. Poor Self-Esteem

Poor Self-Esteem Image

Low self-esteem is usually a result of not knowing yourself, knowing your worth, living authentically, and owning both your strengths and struggles.

This trait leads to many other side effects, such as not believing in yourself or your abilities, criticizing yourself, thinking of yourself as “less than,” etc. This can also result in developing body image issues and eating disorders. To have healthy self-esteem, you need to discover, accept, and love who you really are through re-parenting your inner child.

2. Your Boundaries Are Either Too Weak Or Too Rigid

Do you feel like you don’t really know how to create healthy boundaries with others? Is it hard for you to say “NO” to people? Do you tend to put your needs secondary? This could be a result of you being uncomfortable with saying “NO” to your parents because of the fear to disappoint them or even the fear of punishment. As a child, you were suppressing your needs and desires trying to be a good girl or a good boy for your parents. Now, being an adult, you’re still carrying this program in your unconsciousness. You may even show this in situations where you are intimate with someone even if you don’t feel totally comfortable with it.

OR…

The situation could be totally opposite if you have super rigid, inflexible boundaries that nobody can cross. One of them could be your personal space. When you feel overwhelmed, instead of openly telling people they’ve been disrespecting your need for personal space, you simply cut them off. This kind of behavior is your coping mechanism to protect yourself from being hurt.

3. You Are Ashamed of Expressing Emotions

Shame is a very toxic emotion, especially for children. If you grew up in an environment where sharing and expressing your emotions was considered an expression of weakness, you could still be dealing with shame when it comes to expressing your emotions and feelings.

Shame creates feelings of inadequacy, unworthiness, or regret. The feeling of being ashamed can be experienced as such a negative, intense emotion of self-loathing that it can make a person act like a bully, giving it away by evoking that emotion in others.

childhood trauma Image

When children are emotionally or physically abandoned, abused, or neglected they often take on the shame that belongs to the adult who left or hurt them by assuming that it’s because they themselves are the “bad” one. Some children behave in ways that make them culpable for the shame that belongs to their parents.

4. You Have the Fear Of Abandonment

This fear can be expressed in the form of being clingy, overly insecure, codependent. It can even manifest itself in a form of depression or anxiety.

If you have the fear of abandonment and if you are afraid that people you love can leave you, it becomes impossible to maintain healthy relationships.

The fear of abandonment is one of the most common and most damaging fears of all. This can be a reason for so many unhealthy codependent relationships that exist in modern society.

5. You are a People-pleaser

Do you find yourself clinging to people, grasping for any attention and approval? Do you tend to do anything just to keep people happy and not to lose anyone? Do you feel like it’s super hard for you to let anyone or anything go? If the answer is “yes”, you could be a people-pleaser.

The reason why you could be stuck in the people-pleaser role is that you are afraid of disappointing and frustrating other people. And you are afraid because you unconsciously associate your worth with external validation.

A “people-pleaser” role that you tend to play most likely was manifested in your childhood when you were forced to silence your needs, feelings, emotions, and thoughts, to the point where you weaken your sense of self.

6. You Avoid People

Do you have extreme fear or anxiety when having to deal with or be around people? This can be a sign of a wounded inner child. The degree of avoiding people may vary. It may just be anxiety with a lot of people in a social situation or any amount of people. It may manifest itself in going out of your way to have food and other items delivered to you to keep from interactions. You feel most comfortable and safe when you are staying home.

7. You are Addiction Prone

Do you get easily addicted/attached to drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, pornography, gambling, or any other extreme obsessive tendencies? Do you feel like it’s important for you to receive that rush of “feel good” hormones? Your childhood wounds could be the reason why you’re so easily attached to these obsessive tendencies.

Addiction Prone Image

Did you know that addiction is often a symptom of underlying trauma that hasn’t been processed? Instead of confronting our issues and letting ourselves feel pain, we often tend to block our emotions to avoid feeling pain.

But the truth is, you are not really addicted to the substance itself; you are addicted to the feeling it gives you, to the relief and escapism it provides you.

To recover from your addiction, you need to face your shadow by asking yourself these 3 important questions:

  • What am I avoiding?
  • What am I suppressing?
  • What am I in denial about?

8. You Have Trust Issues

Your distrust is a defense mechanism for avoiding emotional pain, anxiety, fears, and disappointments. Trust issues often stem from a wounded inner child that learned the hard way that people can’t be trusted.

The problem becomes even more complicated when you also have self-doubt. If you were neglected, invalidated, gaslighted, or emotionally abused as a child, it is not easy to build healthy self-esteem and self-confidence.

You have to remember that even the smallest words could cause a wound. For example, if your parents constantly told you “your grades should be better” or “don’t be so sensitive”, you absorb the message that something’s wrong with you and that you will never be good enough. On messages like these, it’s very hard to build self-esteem and self-confidence.

Self-Healing

wounded inner child image

Learning to work with your inner child is about reconnecting with the sincere, childlike part inside.

Inner child healing leads us to a state of purity and innocence. We all have the potential to experience true simplicity by reconnecting with and healing a period of our lives when we saw the world with openness and wonder.

In order to eliminate the feelings of guilt, shame, fear, hatred, disgust, and anger that we carry with us throughout our lives, we must heal the child inside. To do this, we need to earn the trust of our inner child through unconditional love and self-nurturing.

To learn more about the methods of inner child healing, read my article “Inner Child Healing: 4 Surprisingly Effective Practices“.

The Bottom Line

As you can see, your inner child does not disappear once you become an adult. On the contrary, it stays within you, reminding you of all the wounds you haven’t healed yet. There is a variety of symptoms that can point to a wounded inner child. You may have just accepted or tried to ignore many of these behaviors in yourself. However, in order to heal, you need to confront the pain that caused the wounds.

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